Wednesday, November 6, 2013

"Mo Mail!"

Regular contributors Pat and Paula both took the time to comment on the  Cyrsti's Condo Big or Small T.

From Paula:  "Transgender people come from all areas of society, all professions, all strata all ability, and all character. We pretty much reflect all of the society which spawned us. It is therefore inevitable that we will also reflect a wide range of political views, tolerance levels and attitudes. Just because we share this one thing there is no reason to expect that we will share others. The difference comes when we are rejected and hurt by those who we look to for help and support"

From Pat:  "One of the first things that all of us should know is that "One Size Fits All" cannot describe the entire "T" community any better than "One Size Fits All" pantyhose can work for all size bodies. I agree that All men are created equal but that in that general equality we also must respect that every person is different from every other person and that we are all entitled to respect.

 We all have our own individual issues to address. Some of us are old, others young...some large sized, others petite...some have the need to surgically transition, others are comfortable with the occasional cross gender expressions. There are no clear right and wrong people...only people marching to their own different drummer. We are all entitled to respect, freedom and liberty."

Of course of you are spot on. Without going too deep into beating a dead horse around here again, I think there a couple possible sources which these problems stem from.

1.- "Male ego hangover" ...SRS and the resultant pain and expense entitles a person to an exalted spot in a community.  Not unlike a successful job may get a guy a better membership at a country club.

2.- Frustration...very simply not being "fulfilled" by the operation and thinking it may have been a mistake.

3.- Society is changing...slowly but surely the public is learning you don't have to have SRS to live as a woman. Too late for too many older TS women who may think they could have done as much  with less pain and expense.

4.- Appearance...For some unfortunately, all the surgery in the world won't make them into the beautiful woman of their dreams. Same old story, very difficult to buy respect in the world as woman. I can't think of how excruciating it would be to go through all of that to still get harassed by the world.

Please know these are sweeping stereotypes and just opinions and I am far from an expert. I only wish each person to find what satisfaction and happiness they can on whatever level possible.  Referring back to the Carmen Carerra video as she talked about how happy she was, I think it's natural to think her happiness is tied in to her beauty, not her life.

Bottom line is as the girls above said, respect, freedom and liberty should be the standards of a multi layered transgender community.

Carmen Carerra

Carmen Carerra again seems to making yet another name for herself.  It doesn't seem so long ago she had her problems with Rude Paul since she officially dumped the drag queen tag by taking hormones. Now the transgender model is performing in a burlesque show! Where can I buy tickets?  Check out this interview on Inside Edition:


Trans "Stylin' and Profilin'

Before being "profiled" began being a non political correct term, here is how the Urban Dictionary defined it:  "Look good- so fresh and clean."

Today of course for all of us from novice cross dressers to stealth transsexuals, stylin' is important for all of us - trans women and men.

Of course the first reason is obvious.  The more we understand our bodies and how to do our best to work "fashion magic" with them, the easier it is for us to navigate the world in our chosen gender. We have a Cyrsti's Condo "Beauty Nook" Room which is stocked full of a few of the sites I visit on a regular basis because what beauty trend or style is in today may be out tomorrow.  196 years ago when I embarked down this feminine transgender path I'm on, a huge part of the fun of being a girl was playing with styles and fashions and still is.

As I was surfing the web universe I discovered a site called "The Fashionable TG Woman" which I urge you to visit.  It's a veritable wealth of ideas and trends which enable you to put your best girl foot forward!

I have added a couple spots here in Cyrsti's Condo for you to link up...our regular blog list and in the Beauty Nook Room, just down the hallway from the upstairs bath and master bedroom.

Check them out!

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

A Small or a Capital "T"?

Lately it seems the topic "du jour" with me lately has been transgender discrimination within the trans community. So, in the spirit of a very emotional subject, I found this post by Cate O'Malley and decided to pass it along to you "Condo-ites":


"Are you more ‘T’ than me? Let me ask it this way. Are you more of a trans* person than I am? What started this question was a phone call I had with another transwoman who had completed her SRS ten years ago. She is well known in the local community as a resource, guide and a tireless defender of trans* people. It was recommended that I speak with her by a mutual acquaintance.

During our chat, she asked, “What are you?” I was unclear, then she asked, “How far are you going? Are you going to have sexual reassignment surgery?” I replied that I did not anticipate having the surgery, just live full-time. She shot back, “I don’t work with you people. If you aren’t going all the way, then I don’t want to be bothered. I only want to help people who are committed. I don’t do makeup and hair and all that stuff. You’ll need to find someone else.” I was shocked at first. We continued to talk and found much common ground between us.

The conversation was lively, poignant, brutally honest, funny and ultimately a huge help. I came away with a lot of insight and much to ponder and a tremendous amount of respect for her and her work in our community, but also a realization that discrimination exists in the trans* community. My naiveté originally made me think all of us trans* people were kindred spirits and we were all sisters and brothers. Alas, not so."

I used to have the same naive outlook as Cate did until I began to "get out in the transgender world and met more than my share of a few of very mean people. Now I am a believer there could be just too many layers of us to categorize.  You know of course we are the ones who fought so hard against being categorized in a binary gender but then still want too in the transgender culture. The rest of the post is good too and you can see it here.

Of course you know I have more thoughts on the subject but this time I'm going to move on and ignore the drama!

Living the Life

For all or any of us who have had the opportunity to escape our closets and pursue a dream, this story sent in by Pat to Cyrsti's Condo from Pompton Lakes, New Jersey is sure to impress. From NorthJersey.com  : 


"Pompton Lakes lost its most recognizable citizen when Roger Bowne died at 68. Roger Bowne was a well-known cross-dresser in his hometown of Pompton Lakes.

Roger Bowne was a well-known cross-dresser in his hometown of Pompton Lakes. Mr. Bowne held no office. He ran no business. His name never appeared in the local paper. He kept to himself. What he did was parade around in women’s clothing. He liked miniskirts. The shorter the better. Mr. Bowne cross-dressed in public for 30 years.

Had he lived in a bustling city, few would have thought twice about him. But when you are a 6-foot-3 man and show leg while strolling Wanaque Avenue past the diner and the store that sells bagpipes; or while trudging out of the A&P; or while flipping through a magazine at the library, people tend to notice. “Go up to anybody in Pompton Lakes and say ‘Roger,’ ” said Garry Luciani, a retired teacher and coach at the high school. “They’ll know who you’re talking about.” “He was an icon walking up and down the street all these years,” said crossing guard Carol Brautigan, who, when her children were young, had to answer the question: Mommy, why is that man wearing a dress? “We told them Roger had a family but was a little different, and they kind of understood.”

What's even more amazing about Roger and his story is he made the pages of his local paper when he passed- which evidently he was not concerned about during his life. Which makes his story all the more relevant to us all.


"Mr. Bowne’s legend peaked in 2009 when the magazine Weird N.J. featured him in a “Local Heroes” photo spread. He posed beaming in a shiny pink skirt and black top, accented by a hot-pink belt, matching scarf and bracelets. His pumps were blue. His shoulder-length hair shimmered. Pompton Lakes, a working-class town of 11,000, mostly accepted Mr. Bowne, who was a mystery in some ways. His last name wasn’t common knowledge. Nor was the fact that he was a father and a grandfather, or that he had worked as machinist."

RIP Roger! Hope you were buried in your shortest most favorite mini skirt and a smile on your face that someone else was doing your make up! Go here for more.

Monday, November 4, 2013

Transsexual Muse

"Lou Reed with Rachel"
With the passing of rock icon Lou Reed, finally bits and pieces of his transsexual inspiration Rachel are beginning to surface from sites such as Dangerous Minds :

"The source of inspiration for most of the songs on Coney Island Baby, Lou Reed’s transvestite lover and muse Rachel (Tommy) has always been somewhat of a mystery figure. In all that’s been written about Reed, Rachel is barely a footnote. Despite playing a significant romantic role in Reed’s life and even touring with him during the mid-70s, Rachel managed to keep her private life private. Even details of her death are vague. She is rumored to have died in the early 90s."

Go here for more.

Cyrsti's Condo "Horror Scope"

We "Libra's" have a dreamy "Scope" this week!

"Libra (September 23-October 22): Fall in love and forget the rest. Let yourself get lost in a fantasy and allow your creative juices to overflow from all the sappiness inside you now. If you veer off from responsibilities, whatever. You’ve hauled enough stress for the last few weeks to just let it go. Trust in this week, because if you let it happen, it’ll fall into place interestingly enough."

Sounds wonderful! Creativity, love and fantasy all rolled into one sounds positively dreamy! Excuse me while I go kick my stress to the curb!

Check out your scope here from theFrisky!

Finding your Happy Place as a Trans Girl

Image from Trans Outreach, JJ Hart As I negotiated my way through the gender wilderness I was in, I needed to reach out at times to find mom...