Revoked

 This morning my partner Liz and I had a new refrigerator delivered and it was a clown show.

First of all, the refrigerator was damaged. Since our hands were tied and we needed cooling for our food of course, we have to wait two more days for another unit. So we accepted the one which was delivered. 

The clowns who delivered it weren't done though. We paid extra for them to take the old refrigerator away and they left it. When questioned, they said they couldn't get it past the gate the new one just came through. 

I just couldn't accept the fact the whole process would have been different if there would have been a "man" in the house. I felt helpless to provide much backing. 

I know "back in the day" as a guy I could have made a difference. Overall, I still wouldn't trade where I am.

I knew going into my transgender transition, losing my male privilege's would be the most difficult part.  

A Lifetime of Transition

 Georgette, a fellow "more mature" transgender woman sent this comment in from the "Medium" writing format.:

"I read most all of these Late in Life Transition stories, Not for any real knowledge, But to get some perspective of what took so many years for so many to finally make the jump Gender Wise,

I am one of the few that made that jump over 45+ years ago, Like so many others during my youth in the 50s-60s I couldn't understand what was "wrong" with me,

I was accidentally outed when in the US Navy (69-74) around 72/73, I was sure my life was ended but the Navy surprised me and was not discharged,

Because of that I had to find out all I could at the time, TG was not in much use yet, TS and "Gender Identity Disorder" were just starting to be understood more,

The result was from 74-77 I quickly made all the Transition happen with the Final SRS in 77, And lived with my partner (Also Post TS) till she died in 2014,

Since coming back out to a much changed LGBT+ world, I have met SO many (Way too many) late bloomers,

Much of what I have heard from them is "If I had known back then what is known now life would have different",

I have a hard time with relating to most all of the current TG/TS people that I meet,

I will read some more on your travels in all this."

Thanks for the comment! I was in the Army from 1972-1975.

Transgender Royalty

 

Evan (right)

Olympia High School in Orlando, Fla., has crowned its first transgender homecoming queen.

Evan Bialosuknia, a 17-year-old senior, ran her campaign on social media with help from the school’s Gay-Straight Alliance.

“Every year, a beautiful girl wins homecoming queen, and that’s how it always is,”  told CBS News. “Ever since I was little, I was like, ‘I want to be a queen, I want to be that star in a moment of glory.’”

Last week, Bialosuknia “made history,” as she wrote on Instagram, joining an increasing number of LGBTQ students across the country joining homecoming courts and prom royalty.

Mentors

Myself, Nikki, and Kim (right) Photo courtesy Cyrsti 
Hart

 Referring back to a Cyrsti's Condo post concerning several cis women friends I had when I first was learning to play in the women's sandbox, the term "mentors" came up. 

As I thought about it, I became aware mentors could be a very vague term. For example, many could consider a mentor who aides you with your appearance, make up and clothes. 

As you can tell by the photo on the left, my friends did not emphasize much make up at all. I was the only one who did and I did it all myself.

Of course by that time, I had years of practice. 

What my cis friends did teach me was how to value my self as a transgender woman.  Since they both were lesbians, I learned  I did not need a man to validate me as a woman. 

This picture pre dates my relationship with my current partner Liz, so by the time I met her I had a clearer idea of who I was and how I fit in in a feminine world. 

My advice is to be your own mentor. Practice makes perfect as far as your appearance goes. Plus, once you make your way past the appearance phase, the real work begins. Learning to rebuild your personality away from when you tried and failed to live as a guy is a major task. One example is communicating  woman  to woman and dressing to blend. I learned the hard way not totally accept the compliment of looking great. Great for what? A man cross dressed as a woman? 

Granted, finding a mentor of any form is rough. I was just fortunate when I threw caution to the wind and put myself out in the world.  When you find a mentor of any sort, put your old male ego aside and learn all you can.

A Very Good Point

 Recently I wrote a post called "A Bridge too Far" here in Cyrsti's Condo. Along the way in the post about novice transgender women facing the difficult task and decision to fully come out of their closet, I left out a very important point. 

Paula was kind enough to comment on it:

"Most of the things we are frightened of never happen! I suspect that it is fear that held a lot of back, yet it is also our example that it makes it all less scary for those following behind us.

Despite what the haters and the popular news media might like us to belief it is my experience that the vast majority of people, especially cis women! will be our supporters, our helpers, and our defenders. They understand that that they lose nothing, no rights, no security, by accepting us into "the sisterhood".

As I said, great points. Thanks Paula.