Going Through Hell to Get to Heaven?

It seems the more I am around younger LGBT (more specifically the transgender groups) the better their attitude is compared to the "more mature" trans folks.

With all due respect to the Steve Miller Band song, is it because we had to go through hell to get to heaven? With all due respects to the "youngsters" the world is changing quickly in regards to the transgender community, so maybe they should have a better attitude. OR, do we "more mature" trans folk just harbor some grumpy resentment?

After all most of us were trapped in very small dark closets without even a glimmer of hope from a computer screen. Also, by the time we were able to attempt a transition, our bodies were wrecked by the ravages of years of testosterone, unless we were very fortunate.

Or it could be just a basic change of attitude. Some waited so long to get to where they wanted to go in a feminine world, when they got there, it proved to not be what they thought. After all, it wasn't for me.

Nearly nothing was bad for me, it was just facing the 24/7 world as a trans woman was just different. I had to reach some magical point of blending versus of looking like I wasn't trying, which has seemed to be a recent point of emphasis here in Cyrsti's Condo. Probably because of two post opt transgender women I have seen recently. At one of the meetings, another member said she spent about a half hour on her makeup and one of the post opts said "I only spend a couple minutes.'' Being the smart arse I am, I almost said "It looks like it." But I didn't. No matter how snarky she is, there should be no need to jump into the snake pit with her.

Maybe too, it's an idea Connie and I used to discuss years ago. What if you went through all the pain and suffering only to find you were in an irreversible miserable lonely place? An ugly new closet indeed.

I wish I could share a lengthy FB post I read recently from a much younger trans woman friend of mine who just had a boob job, FFS and other work done. She looks good but now is facing
the prospect of dating crazies from both sides of the gender aisle.

I guess so many people can go thru hell and never get to heaven. Sorry Steve.

For the Trans Kids

As promised, I went to the downtown Cincinnati rally Thursday night protesting the 45's administration handling of the school transgender restroom ban.

Even though the weather was chilly and blustery, a nice turnout showed up for the rally. One of the city commissioners attended as well as four or five other speakers from LGBT organizations around the metro area. For most in my mind was the representative from the Cincinnati Public School Board. She made a strong point of telling the crowd the school board was going to enact it's own inclusive transgender rest room legislation.

Photo: Raya Schweitzer

I just wish more trans kids could be pulled back from under the bus they recently were tossed under-without a say.

Don't I Know You?

Last weekend, one of the classic movie channels showed the movie Some Like it Hot with Tony Curtis, Jack Lemmons and Marilyn Monroe. The 1959 classic is based on Lemmons and Curtis trying to elude the Chicago Mob in drag after witnessing a hit.

Throughout the movie mostly Curtis who appeared more predominately as a man and woman was asked "Don't I know you?"

Which brings me to a point from my last post "Oh No She Didn't" when I mentioned being recognized when I was cross dressed before I went 24/7.

Taking the subject a bit further was Mandy Sherman:

Oh, but as we know, they CAN and WILL recognize you! 

IMHO the only way to"possibly" avoid it is to NOT wear your hair the normal way when dressed. Mine "is what it is." All the time. Dressed or androgynous. And I'm recognizable. I don't care... 

A couple of years ago, I went into a restaurant on the other side of the Chesapeake, about 60 miles from home (in a congested shopping area), fully femme. A safe thing to do, right? Ummm...not so much. Our current next door neighbors were having dinner there. Oops. And I didn't see them.

I'm still not sure if they got an eyefull...but they could have seen everything! They didn't say hello till AFTER I was seated, and they both were on the way to the potty before leaving. It's hard to hide earrings, painted nails and a skirt when you're trapped at a table in a restaurant.

Those same folks invited my wife and I to a party at their house later in the season. I was nervous, but nothing was said...so I'll never know for sure what they saw. Yes, they've seen me running around the house in one of my house-dresses, so they DO know...

The makeover I sat for a couple years ago proved that the only way to possibly "not" be recognized is a drastic change in hairstyle. I have long, dark, wavy and somewhat flyaway hair with dishwater blondish ends, and the wig the artist put on me was a dark chin length bob, rather short and with uniform color. (You can see it in my posts "The Marvelous Weekend", parts 1 through 3 from August of 2014) 

With that wig, even my own mother can't recognize me in a picture! Yes, Mom knows I dress and isn't overly fond of it, but with dementia she doesn't remember (though she normally does recognize me in pictures with my regular girl clothes...) Fortunately, the memory disappears before I hit the door on the way out.

Hang in there, girlfriend!

Mandy

Thanks Mandy! I have provided a link to her blog above :) As far as "hanging" goes, these days I try to not let the noose get too tight!