Transgender Time Line

Thanks to Bobbie for passing along this link to a wonderful New York Times article called Increasingly Visible, Transgender Americans Defy Stereotypes.

From the article:   "Transgender women and transgender men have gone from marginal to trendy,” according to Susan Stryker, an associate professor at the University of Arizona, of the study of gender identity. Earlier this year , Ms. Stryker started TSQ: Transgender Studies Quarterly, the first publication of its kind."

Christine Jorgensen 

We all know though, the road has been long and hard. And- before you go out and spend big money on your new trendy wardrobe it's always good to take a look at where we have come from and never forget where we have to get to.

The last time I looked, most of us STILL don't enjoy the basic rights of all other American's. Hell, we still can't even serve in the military.

All in all though, I even have to give Bruce Jenner some credit here. After all, we know at the least he will have a trendy wardrobe. 

Cross Dressers and Wives

In many ways, this is an "equal time" post here in Cyrsti's Condo. It's for all of you who identify as cross dressers.   

Through Tasi Zuriak and an e-mail she passed along- I can pass along (no pun intended) news about a new feature in the Huffington Post. It's written by Terri Lee Ross and called How to Tell Your Wife you are a Cross dresser. Here is an excerpt:

"Conflicted over your cross-dressing habit, you try to make peace with it and quit attempting to figure out why you have this desire to wear woman's clothing. Your therapist says you are normal, so why can't you tell anyone about your desire to dress and let your femme self out for others to see? The one person you want to share your femme self with is your wife, the mother of your children, your best friend and partner in life.

Yet, you don't know how to tell her. You are afraid she will abandon you or look badly on your behavior, thinking it is a sexual fetish that she wants no part of, when dressing is something that you were born with and a part of you that is begging to be exposed.

According to Sister House, a popular site for cross-dressers, about 70% of their audience have expressed that they have told their wives. The other 30% are still hiding in the shadows wanting to come out and share their femme self."

Follow the link for the rest of a great post that I can certainly relate to. Of course my situation was different because I told my wife before we were married. Over the course of a 25 year marriage and before she departed this world-the problem with me was dishonesty.  As I began to come to grips with being transgender, I was dishonest with myself and her.  She always made it very clear if I wanted to live as a woman, that's cool but we would just part as friends. So I tried to have it both ways (or hide it) which didn't work.

Finally, I just have to be a little snarky and point out when you do talk to your spouse-very quickly into the conversation, add in "Relax dear, I'm not like Bruce Jenner."

The Thrill is Gone?

Since I am not allowed to call her "my co-blogger" Connie mentioned the passing of blues legend BB King :  " I've always thought that "The Thrill is Gone" could be an anthem for those of us who have given up the activity of cross dressing to become genuine in transition - 24/7. Being a transgender person certainly is accompanied by the blues, anyway." 

How true all of that is Connie!  I have written here in Cyrsti's Condo of the fireman I knew years ago who compared the thrill of cross dressing to going on a fire run. I of course don't know anything about that and need to mention she went on to complete SRS. So maybe the final thrill was on the operating table when she left to pursue a life as a woman? 

Seriously, the whole subject is one I struggled with for years. After all, it is much easier to get dolled up once or twice a week as a cross dresser than it is to go full time as a transgender woman. My only advice to those who are thinking they want to make the "jump" - get out there and try it on for size. It is the only way you can learn the true "nuances" of living in the feminine world. 

It worked for me and I never have looked back but as Connie said "being a transgender person certainly is accompanied by the blues!" R.I.P. BB King.