Mo Minutia

As promised, Connie's comment about eating in public from the Cyrsti's Condo post about transgender women and cross dressers:

"I can pass along a bit of information that might help those who are wanting to develop a more feminine manner of eating. Try eating with the other hand. I'm right handed, but I've had a lot of trouble with my neck and right shoulder, to the point that I have trouble negotiating a forkful of food into my mouth at times. I can't eat soup without some of it dribbling off the spoon and down my chin. So, I have had to retrain myself to use my left hand. In doing so, I have had to be slow and deliberate with each bite, and any shoveling I may have done before just doesn't happen anymore. The best thing about doing this is that, when I do try to eat with my right hand now, I eat the same way as I taught myself to eat with my left hand. Even if you never master eating with the opposite hand, the process of learning and thinking about it can help to create new and better habits.

Speaking of using a knife and fork to eat a hamburger, I did that for the first time many years ago when I was out to an up-class burger place with a trans girlfriend of mine. She, though, just picked up her juicy and messy burger with both hands and devoured it before I was even 1/3 done with mine. I was embarrassed to be seen at the same table with her, and I've never eaten with her again. Of course, my mother demanded proper table manners when I was growing up, and some people were not so lucky, I guess. Don't forget to put your napkin on your lap immediately upon sitting at the table, too. My friend never touched hers until she'd finished her burger - and then she used it more like a washcloth. Talk about messing up your lipstick (and more!)"

Thanks Connie!

What Makes a Girl?

Lately, I have read some mostly unsettling comments concerning the need for genital realignment surgery, and I had to add my two cents, of course.

I'm paraphrasing, but essentially the comments were a variation of the same old ones which said no matter how much surgery one goes through, you are still the same person sexually.

In essence that is true and does make a great argument for transgender women and trans men when you think it through from our angle.

Take me for example. I am not seeking any "bottom surgery" but in my mind, genitals don't make the person anyhow. I still feel like a woman and always have. I just took a different path than most all other cis women to get here.

To be sure, my breasts, full head of hair and softening skin give me the sensual experiences of being feminine and help me to project my true transgender self to the world, but if they were all taken away tomorrow, I wouldn't change.

Plus yesterday, I had one of the rare days when I felt my makeup, clothes and overall appearance were the best I had experienced in a while. Even still, I am the same person gender-wise, a girl. I just aligned all my personal stars for a change.

I still am amazed at the number of people (some of whom went through GRS) who obviously didn't know, or think through the total changes which would occur. Many I think, just wanted a vagina for some sort of an ego trip, not the deep down urges of body/mind alignment. Otherwise, they wouldn't be so bitter about the process.

In this day and age people, transgender or not need to have a better understanding of the differences between sexuality and gender. Especially in the overall LGBT world before they start spouting off about it!

We Got Mail!

First of all, my first trip to the Veterans Administration hospital to have my fluids (blood) checked didn't go as well as planned because my iron was too high for the first time in a year and I had to have a pint drawn. Oh well. I will live, plus the rest of the day went OK as far as stares, etc...even to the point of one of my doctors complimenting me on my appearance. Praise goes a long way :).

Now, on to the mail:

"Emma" commented that these days it is seemingly never a good time to draw the line in the sand with someone who challenges you being transgender. You never know what they may be carrying with them! (weapons). I very much agree!

As far as our Cyrsti's Condo "Transgender Minutia" post went, Paula commented:

"This is valuable advice that I have been trying to pass on to some of my (Cis) female family members for several years, I'm afraid some of them still favour the bulldozer feeding system and consider my idea of manners to be old fashioned and unnecessary.

I was brought up with the maxim "Manners maketh man" but it very much also applied to ladies!"

Indeed Paula! I have a cis woman friend who insists on belching like a teen aged boy where ever we go to eat and blames it on her ulcer. I have known plenty of people with ulcers who can control themselves in public and at least try to act respectful to others.

Mandy commented on chicken wings: "Ain't that the truth about eating chicken wings...of course you'll get to re-do your lipstick, but also much of your facial makeup, as well! (Leaving much of that makeup on your napkin...)

Hugs,

Mandy"

Both Mandy and Paula have very interesting blogs which I have added links to here (as you may have noticed!) thanks girls, plus I have a longer comment from Connie coming up in a future post. Isn't it fun being transgender? Well, at least we are different. Even in the larger LGBT community!

Transgender Minutia

If you are a fledgling transgender woman or cross dresser just beginning to make your way in the world, one of the more important male habits which can get you outed  is how you eat.

While cis women vary widely in eating habits, we trans girls are not afforded the same luxury. We just have to be better.

Various tips include, cutting food in smaller bites and tilting your head slightly as you eat. Plus, by all means don't shovel your food in! That giant hamburger needs to be cut and maybe even eaten with the help of a fork. Depending on where you are, or who you are with, those chicken wings may not be such a good choice.

Eating usually interferes with lipstick too, so care should be taken. Plus how women eat is considered to be sensual by more than a few cis men.

All of these tips are learned by cis girls growing up, but again, we transgender and or cross dressers never had a chance to learn. After all, eating like a girl got you the unwanted "sissy" label.

"Bon appetite" !

All Quiet on the Midwestern LGBT Front?

These days, quiet can only be counted in days and the accused terrorist killer in Charlottesville, actually is from the Northern Kentucky area around Cincinnati and was living near Toledo, Ohio...so sometimes quiet can be deceiving. And, while we are on the subject, my sympathies go out to the victims of the Barcelona, Spain terrorist attack. Sad and tragic, again. The world is a wreck.

On my personal side, I have several appointments coming up, including a group get together tonight which is not a transgender specific group.

Also, next week, I have my fluid levels checked (blood work) Tuesday at the Veterans Administration hospital and a visit with my therapist on Thursday.

My wardrobe has been checked and rechecked for the visits, so all should be good. Knock on wood!

Where ever you may be world wide, I hope you are safe too, and your LGBT life is allowed to be a bit boring!