What the 'Bleep???'

It's that time kids...The end of a year, which of course always forces us to think "What the Bleep?" Did I do that? 

As 2016 rapidly approaches, it's time to do just that...over a couple posts.

First things first though. Yesterday Liz and I attended the one year memorial of the tragic suicide of transgender teen  Leelah Alcorn. The tough subject was handled with class and dignity.

2015 for me also marked the most serious health scare of my life, which resulted in suspension of my estrogen until the Doc's tracked my liver/iron problems. Fortunately, the first new prescription (of two) came in the mail recently (as you probably read here in Cyrsti's Condo.) I never had to stop my testosterone blocker though.

Estrogen is a funny critter.  Over the years I have found many in the "community" have taken the hormone illegally to the point of injury. And, others have used the fact they were on estrogen mainly to brag and seemingly use it to hammer others. Something like "Whoo Hoo!" I'm on the 'Juice' -nadee-nadee-boo boo!

Then there is Maria!: 

Good luck, Girlfriend! I'm GG and they won't give me HRT (which I need due to a hysterectomy 25 years ago) because my mom had breast cancer. I am happy for you, though. For sure. Wishing you all the best.

Thanks Maria !! I had been on estrogen for approximately three years. Enough to feel and understand the changes I was going through. I think you need the full three to have any idea of the effects, or should I say the nuances on a male body.

My goal is now (as I begin again) is to be a quicker "study" of the feminine changes which will be happening again.

Finally, here is my usual HRT disclaimer: Just because I (or anyone) is on HRT does not mean I am a more accomplished transgender woman than anyone else. I'm not a Doc of any sorts, but for ME the balance of way less testosterone and way more estrogen in my body has been completely and totally dramatic. Consider too, you may be already have higher estrogen or testosterone levels to deal with.

In my next post we are going to look at the the boring but equally as dramatic world of gender markers and how they mesh with HRT. 

Where is That Damn Mailman?

Not that don't think the mailman isn't the most sexy guy in the world normally, but yesterday he became even more desirable when he dropped off the first set of estrogen patches from the VA.

I have one more set coming (I hope) today then the plan is to restart my full set of HRT on New Years Eve.

Exactly three years since I started the first time in 2012 (New Years Eve).

Wow! 

Why is a Transgender Person Like a Top?

First of all, do you know what a "top" is? Here is one definition: A top is a toy designed to be spun rapidly on the ground, the motion of which causes it to remain precisely balanced on its tip because of inertia. Such toys have existed since antiquity (From Wikopedia).

Forget about the use of the word "toy" in this Cyrsti's Condo post and insert "Gyro" (seen to the left) If we can sync up our mental genders to our physical characteristics, then our internal gyro's are in sync. Of course, the opposite is true too.

I remember years ago, back in my "mirror worshiping" days, I would stare in the mirror any number of times or places just to catch a glimpse of the cross dressed me. The "ancient" pictorial example I am showing you.

I would look at the picture and in the mirror-head out the door and immediately get smirked at once I got out in the world.

My gyro was all messed up and it still happens today. 

Anymore though, I have been successful in keeping my gyro spinning fairly well by knowing where I am headed to with my external look. 

Starting with my hair, I am still learning how to get the products I use to give me the look I want-with the help of a hair dryer these days. I found out the hard way that without HRT, my hair would and could thin out the way I was brushing it. 

Moving down, my breasts have lost some plumpness (deflate-gate?) But, I am hoping when I start back on estrogen in a couple weeks, I will regain my losses. Body wise, my only other expectation for my wish list is to re-continue my skin softening an redistribution to the hips.

So, as you can read, I spend some effort in keeping my "gyro" spinning in sync. And, every once in a while I get it right. 

Advice? Use the mirror as a tool-not a voice. Dress to your strengths or/your soul-as a woman. Not what your male fantasy thinks it should be. And finally, no matter what Connie says this kind of Gyro is NOT a sandwich.

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Ker Plunk! Listen closely! Another Sunday Edition is hitting your virtual front porch. I hope this finds you safe from all the terrible weather and nastiness sweeping our country. The West Coast is on fire, Oklahoma is hosting blizzards, Texas and the South -tornadoes. Rachel in particular, I hope you are good. Around here in Southern Ohio, we are still very warm but very rainy. We will be getting cold though and more than likely, low lying floods are in the Ohio River's future here. Enough of that, lets get a Cup o Joe (coffee) and get started:

Eddie Redmayne (right)

Page One: The Week that Was - or Wasn't: Of course another week has come and gone along with Christmas. The whole season touches a tender chord with all the transgender and GLBQ community who have been separated from their families-by ignorance. Elsewhere, The Danish Girl has/is hitting the silver screens.

I have not seen the movie yet. But when I do, I am going to try to put away any bias I may have had on who was chosen to play the role, in fact, I wanted to see an actor attempt to capture the overwhelming emotions/uncertainties of changing genders.


Page Two: Yesterday's Coffee - Opinion:  A year or so ago,  17 year old transgender girl Leelah Alcorn stepped out in front of a semi truck and committed suicide. Not far from Cincinnati, Ohio where I live. In memory of,
Cincinnati, OH, December 22, 2015 — The Transgender Community of Greater Cincinnati is holding a Press Conference and Call to Action at 10 am Monday December 28, 2015 on the steps of City Hall 801 Plum St, Cincinnati OH, 45202. 

The Press Conference and Call to Action will share the love, affirmation, and acceptance given to all attending the vigils held earlier this year to remember Leelah Alcorn. It will also outline what the immediate needs are for members of the Trans community most at risk: Trans youth and Trans Women of Color.

"Last January we gathered at Kings High School and the Woodward Theater to honor Leelah's life" said Lindsey Deaton, one of the organizers of those vigils. "This Monday we will be meeting again to remember her Spirit, answer her call to fix society and name the Trans communities lack of access to emergency shelter or housing, the lack of access to medical care, to drug and alcohol treatment and to job training".

‘There have been many positive changes in the ecology for Trans adults and children in Cincinnati,’ said Deaton. ‘With the leadership of City Councilmember Chris Seelbach, Cincinnati is now the first city in the United States to ban the kind of reparative conversion therapy experienced by Leelah’.

Liz and I will be there.

Page Three: Oh No She  'Dint!'  I have passed along the story of when I was called a "Sir" when picking up a ham for Christmas dinner this week. I promptly emailed the company and getting a response back from the company the next day.

What I haven't passed along though, is how this morning I came out to one of the few long term friends I have left. (By email as she isn't that close.)I will give you more info and how it all worked out-if I hear back!

Page Four- The Back Page: By this time next week, we will be into 2016. Here's hoping your find the rest of 2015 a safe one! Thanks for stoping by Cyrsti's Condo - Love you all!

Green Eggs and Trans Ham?

I hope you all had a festive and merry holiday yesterday and you were able to dodge the out of control weather which is sweeping the U.S and the UK to some extent also. Don't worry about that pesky global warming when the lawns in Ohio are turning green in December and the trees are trying to bud. As nice as no ice and snow around here is-or flooding (yet) or tornadoes (yet) I shudder to think what's coming.

Getting down to the subject matter, you may remember my post a couple days ago about being "mis gendered" at a local upscale meat chain store down the street. It was busy and a young cashier called me "sir." I pretty much have had it these days with instances such that and wheeled on her - asked her what she called me-then called her on it and left.

Later, when I got home, I looked for the omni present coupon/survey companies have on their sales terminal tapes. Example? A free bee or discount on a future purchase. I found the coupon info and filled out the obvious-at least one of their employee's may need a dose of sensitivity training when they are faced with dealing with a transgender guest in their store. It's not 'neat' or humorous and totally serious to the trans person - totally.

Of course the manager sympathized with me  and asked if I caught the name of the cashier? I said no I didn't and I knew the store was very busy and I didn't want anything but for the crew to know I knew and stop it.

The next transgender person after me may not be so understanding and I didn't think his store would want to be known for hiring transphobic employees.

Clean Up on Aisle 5!!!!!

Yesterday, when all the Christmas dinner shopping was tossed  on my lap, I was reminded of how it is to live in a land of plenty (bordered by the second highest child poverty rate on one side of us (Liz's house) and a rural drug epidemic only a few miles to the east. 

I didn't have much time to ponder the situation yesterday as I had been trusted to prepare and pick up the shopping list...Wow! Power! Fear!

We live off a really busy shopping street so I got an early start and made it to a store where we had a coupon for a very good ham. I was still very much buzzed from my successful name change and felt really good until I stepped up to pay and the cashier said "can I have your phone number sir?" GRRRR- I ignored her. Finally she said "Can I have your phone number?" I just said "What did you call me???" I don't think the little bitch did anything but smirk and there were 20 some people in line behind me, so I paid and when on my way. It turned out, I had bigger fish to fry-disguised as women in upscale Cadillac or BMW SUV's trying to jam them in small spaces. I was lucky, I found a spot six miles (it seemed) from the store.

From there, all bets were off. I was not to be trusted with my steel trap but slightly rusted mind and was given a partial shopping list to build from. The store was so big and so busy, if they were out of something (like eggs), all I had to do was seek out something else I was looking for and come back. The eggs would magically reappear. Wow!

Inside the store, the gender minority (men) took over the insanity and ran with it - really ran with it. Guys with carts determined to cut a half hour shopping trip into 15 minutes. Dangerous and made even more so when the inevitable interaction with an old folk or two occurred. 

Amazingly enough, I made it and for of those of you who want to know -or care if I got called "sir" anymore - no I didn't. The crazy peeps in the store wouldn't haven't cared if I was a Martian, just get the hell out of the way.

I did get out and escaped the pre Christmas shopping fun that cis women have had fun with for years. Gee-I guess like changing diapers, I am now a step closer to reaching some sort of stereotypical transgender nirvana. Wow!

Merry Christmas

First of all Merry Christmas to all you Cyrsti's Condo readers who celebrate the holiday! I hope this post finds you with friends or family today. Although giving is supposed to be the base of the celebration of Jesus's birth, we are conditioned at a very early age to receive. That is another story, try to make this day a haven from a very contentious world!

Cyrsti's Condo "From the Heart"

Suburban Sprawl is like a piece of white bread - it's all the same until you change the topping.

Jess I Am

Well, I can't remember the day I was born the first time, but today was as close as a person could come to being born again- (although some believe a religious experience can get them there.)

If you stop by Cyrsti's Condo much I'm sure you have read this was a huge day for me. At 10 o'clock this morning, Liz and I were meeting in front of a probate court judge to get "Jessie Jeanne" legalized as my new name. Before you have your own idea's of a naming ceremony-the name represents a combination of family names. (Another blog post-as well as name progressions, or regressions during my life.)

Mind you, we had to make the nearly two hour drive to my old home town to do it. Following the "ceremony" we had to keep moving and stopped at my old building for another load of old clothes we are putting together to give to homeless shelters around here and then headed over to Dayton to the VA Center. Very quickly, we were able to interrupt the VA officer handling my gender/name changes and give him the newly "minted"name change papers - to get the gender process completed there.

From there we headed back to Cincinnati. Liz picked up some yarn for a project she was doing and I completed the forms to send over to the state BMV to begin the process to change my drivers's license. 

By this time it was time for dinner.

Afterwards, I was able to beg my way into having her helping me set up the new lap top and- here I am!

Such a day ! Details to come.