He's Such a Girl

Everyone once in a while, my partner's twenty year old son does something to cause both of us (or at least me) to think, he is such a girl. Of course, I may be just thinking out of jealousy, when he gets part of his hair dyed blue, or something else.

At his age I was never able to think much about acting girlish. I was too busy getting ready for three years serving Uncle Sam. Looking ahead to basic training takes most girly thoughts right out of your head. Or at least, it did for me.

Ironically though, I can't remember thinking three years of intense testosterone training would solve any of my gender malfunctions, commonly known as gender dysphoria. I know many transgender women join the military hoping to do just that.

When I go to any of my cross dresser - transgender support group meetings, one of my favorite things to do to keep me remotely engaged, is to imagine what other attendees were like before their transition. I usually do it for everyone, especially if they are a novice cross dresser. Many, I wish I had their body style because they are naturals!

Very simply put...he is such a girl!

HRT

First of all, "HRT" refers to hormone replacement therapy or the taking of hormones of the opposite birth gender, while taking another med to decrease your existing gender hormones.

If it sounds complicated, some time it is and sometimes it isn't, depending many times on your age and health. For example, taking extra estrogen (or a synthetic replacement) has been linked to extra blood clots and other health problems.

So, HRT is not for everyone and should always be administered under the guidance of a physician.

My reason for outlining all of this comes from a comment from Connie:

FABULOUSCONNIEDEEJuly 23, 2018 at 5:51 PM

"I'm always so happy when one of my comments elicits a meaningful response (less often, my meaningful comments cause illicit responses). I'm sure that my proverbial check is in the proverbial mail - and lost, once again. :-)

If I may respond to Melissa's comment, I want her to know that I have not undergone hormone therapy because Of a medical condition (blood clots), so I talk of HRT mainly through my observations of other trans women. I have come to the conclusion that HRT is powerful fuel for one who is ready to handle it, but I've also noted that those who aren't ready can be powerfully fooled by it. You need to first develop a thick skin to handle the adversity that comes with transitioning, and HRT can lead to thin skin - both literally and figuratively."

I will have to check with the post office to see if your checks have found their way to the same place as mine! :)

Thanks for reminding everyone, HRT is not for everybody and will cause powerful changes. So, if you are considering beginning hormone therapy, expect your life to change. Often in more ways than you would ever think.

In no way though, does taking hormones make you more transgender than the next trans woman. 

Feminine Spirit

Back we go to Michelle West's comment concerning meshing your feminine spirit with your male physical being.

One of the most common questions I get, continues to be, when did I know I was transgender.

Looking back, I probably always had a feminine spirit I was trying to contain. My physical male self fought quite the battle for over a half century.

Along the way, I worked when I could on transforming my male side into something more palatable to my feminine spirit just screaming to get out. Each time I was able to cross dress and get a short fix, life seemed better for a short while. All too quickly though, my inner girl was screaming for more. Ironically, she didn't seem to understand I was doing the best I could and my male self was fighting too.

Life was hell, when both of my genders battled. I self medicated too much with alcohol and became a "macho" drinker. Along with that came participation in many ultra masculine activities, like sports and smoking cigars. What made life even more frustrating, was being a guy came so easy to me on occasions and was even fun. At the same time, I never lost my feminine compass.

Slowly but surely, my feminine side began to gain a bigger foothold as I cross dressed and went out a couple days a week. I learned small lessons each time but was forced to go back to guy mode and forget most of them.  I endured though, and even began to establish a small life where people only knew me as a woman...transgender or not.

Of course, we all know how this story ends. All the doors magically began to open in my early 60's and I was able to complete a MTF gender transition. For years now, I have been able to live on HRT full time as a woman.

It took my feminine spirit a long time to do it but like any patient woman, she knew what she wanted and she got it.