So...You Want to be a Girl?

I recently posted this on " Hub Pages".  The idea is one we have shared here so I thought I would bring it back.

"Yes I'm a transgendered male who wants to be a woman. The idea is as natural to me as it is foreign to you. You see I was born male but live female most of the time. I can't even begin to consider what a life in one gender would be like. I am transgendered.
I used to envy the majority of human beings who were born exclusively into one gender. A boy always knew he was a boy and a girl always knew she was a girl..Right? How easy that must be! No gender struggles with society, peer groups, family and friends.
How does it feel to always feel secure in public as a man or a woman, never having to worry about being exposed?
Think of the money and extra time I would have saved if I had never felt the need to not be what I was born to be
What deep obsession led me down a path most of you will never understand? If I could tell you in a thousand words or less, I would have a chance at some obscure "Nobel" prize. The only fact I can tell you is I feel the need to cross into my non birth gender as much as you feel the need not to. Does it make any sense I don't understand you as much as you don't understand me?
I do understand both of us will probably never understand why and that is perfectly fine. The problem is when you don't understand and try to hurt me. Hurt can be applied in many forms. The worst of course is physical. At times, a beating is the easy way out and death is the harshest punishment administered. Just for a lack of understanding.
Hurt can also come in small yet effective doses. I've grown used to the stares and side glances. The hurt never goes away when I hear the nasty little comments or hear the giggles. All of that too I've learned to live with, it's part of the territory and try as I might I try to not think of your imperfections such as weight or appearance.
Think of my dilemma this way. When you developed your gender identity, it was difficult enough to find your way. Your path was lit however. At the least you knew you were a boy or girl. You had role models and maybe even mentors who helped show you the way to becoming a man or a woman. You weren't on the outside looking in.
Understand I'm not looking for your sympathy. For what reason I was put on my path as sure as you were put on yours. I'm only seeking standard human acceptance. I'm no better or worse than you. In fact I'm the same.
The only benefit I may have is a better understanding of you. The pain and suffering of crossing the gender border has not left me unscathed. I have learned the hard way bits and pieces of what makes both genders operate. Ironically that very understanding makes some of you afraid of me. Somehow you feel I have no right to be in your world even though I'm not. Just crossing public paths shopping, eating or whatever does not put me in your world and I have no super sneaky bad intentions! I am not using my knowledge of both genders to fool you or hurt you in any way. In fact the opposite is true! I crave your acceptance of my true gender.
So, I wanted to be a girl and finally came to accept my transgender status as sure as you accepted yours.
Now I have to accept the fact most of us will never understand each other's gender journey and that's fine. Surely in this great big world we can find room for one another. You do have the edge however. When you see me for who I am, my life finally becomes complete."

Looking for a Transgender Therapist?

Check this blog "Walking in Two Worlds: A Trans Therapist 's Journey" if you are searching or thinking of searching for a therapist who has transgendered experience.
The author is "Sherri Lynne" who is not only a psychotherapist but a trannsexual  woman too.
The post is rather lengthy but is very informational and well done.
I don't really know how my VA therapist was assigned to me but I feel very lucky she was.
I was intrigued by two of "Sherri Lynne's" ideas in particular.
The first was her estimate of the number of transsexuals in our society today. She used the number of patients she sees and roughly compared the number to the population within a four hour radius of her practice. She came to the conclusion transgender and or transsexual individuals equal the number of gay people in out society.
I believe her. Business is so good for the doctor I'm going to for hormone therapy that he is closing his family practice, adding a partner and seeing only transgender, gay and lesbian patients.
Her other idea was a use of the drug called "D.E.S.". If you were born between 1938 and 1971 there is a good chance your mother was given the drug during her pregnancy. Of course there is no concrete proof but "D.E.S."has possible  links to higher instances of transgender or transsexual children.
If true at all, you may have had less control over your gender choices than  previously thought.
As I said, if you are considering seeking out a therapist-this is a must read!

Transgender "Two Spirit" World

One of my favorite topics and one I still haven't researched as much as I like; is the status and relationships transgendered individuals carried on in ancient cultures. Specifically Native American.
The "she wired" site  posted a Thanksgiving article reminding us the holiday is not a day of celebration for Native Americans but a day of mourning. In many ways Thanksgiving 1621 was the beginning of persecution and genocide for the numerous tribes.
The "Reverend Irene Moore" went on to remember the role of "two spirited" transgender individuals in the native cultures and how the culture changed:
"Homophobia is not indigenous to Native American culture. Rather, it is one of the many devastating effects of colonization and Christian missionaries that today Two-Spirits may be respected within one tribe yet ostracized in another.
"Homophobia was taught to us as a component of Western education and religion," Navajo anthropologist Wesley Thomas has written. "We were presented with an entirely new set of taboos, which did not correspond to our own models and which focused on sexual behavior rather than the intricate roles Two-Spirit people played. As a result of this misrepresentation, our nations no longer accepted us as they once had."
Traditionally, Two-Spirits symbolized Native Americans' acceptance and celebration of diverse gender expressions and sexual identities. They were revered as inherently sacred because they possessed and manifested both feminine and masculine spiritual qualities that were believed to bestow upon them a "universal knowledge" and special spiritual connectedness with the "Great Spirit." Although the term was coined in the early 1990s, historically Two-Spirits depicted transgender Native Americans. Today, the term has come to also include lesbian, gay, bisexual, and intersex Native Americans.

How unfortunate we weren't influenced more by the ancient cultures. How much easier would life have been?