It is very hard for me to believe I can go back on the blog now and see what I was up to a year ago. Have I learned anything or not?
Here is one of those posts I would like to share:
"Becoming transgenderized takes a lot of work!
In my little corner of the world the heat and humidity has returned- along with the need for cool summer fashion.
The transgenderized process becomes a bigger challenge. Obviously body hair is a priority along with foot and toe nail maintenance. No winter jeans, sweaters and boots to cover imperfections.
Fortunately, I've been able to put together some outfits that have presented well.
No matter how you present and how complete the transgenderized process becomes, you still have to exude the confidence to enjoy the process. There is nothing wrong with me!
One very good way to build your confidence is with the "sun glass" game.(Or destroy it)
Put on your best outfit and your sharpest sun glasses and head for people. My choice was Friday about 6:30 at an outdoor upscale mall.
No big secret to the process. I could observe everyones reaction to me young and old, male and female.
Would all or none recognize I was a transgenderized person?
Friday, I'm happy to say was a huge success. I got nothing from the public. Window shopped the mall and made my two pub stops.
The only contacts who knew my background were my regular bartenders. Seemingly, the better I present, the more fun they have with our "secret".
When this happens to you it is the time to push your boundaries and build your confidence!
Work on your voice and interact more with others. Reach out to them! Regular contacts will view you more as a person!
If by chance you didn't present so well go back to the drawing board! Unfortunately,
trial and error has been my drawing board.
So many problems with so many looks starting with the hair. I really don't want to tell you the number of different wigs I have accumulated!
I have one I call the "suicide" blond. I dearly love it! Streaked highlights and great volume. It's fun hair. BUT:
If I wear it I'm
way more likely to be read. I learned the hard way!
I fight a constant battle with my transgenderized self. She needs to stay within herself.
When she does the world is a much better place!"
The first thought that stands out to me was that I was looking for reaction to me. These days I don't. Of course I'm always searching for that perfect outfit to look my best! What woman shouldn't? Overall though, I have made huge strides feeling comfortable who I am in my chosen gender.
Throw out my blond debacle a couple months ago and I have followed much of my own advice. Certainly the year has made a huge difference...mostly mental.
As my interior female has enjoyed her chance to grow, life has become incredibly more enjoyable.
I can only guess what next years post will say!
