On Line Action?

Recently here in Cyrsti's Condo, we have slightly covered the subject of on line dating sites and their availability to transgender women or men. In fact, over the years many have become nothing more than glorified porno sites attracting "admirers" of trans women and/or cross dressers.I have another experience which goes back to the very earliest days of on line chat rooms. But first, here is an experience from Connie:

"Maybe I shouldn't admit this publicly, especially just two weeks away from a 49th anniversary, but I dabbled in dating sites a number of years ago. I labeled myself "woman 'curious' about women," and I never mentioned that I was trans. I did say that I was married, although I was careful to always say "spouse" and never used a pronoun. I was not interested in finding a relationship; I just wanted to see if I could be seen as a woman (or be seen as attractive by another woman). I don't think the term "catfishing" had even been coined yet, but I guess I was sort of doing it. I'm not proud of what I did. There were a couple women who were really interested in meeting me, even though they lived in California. One was ready to buy a plane ticket to Seattle, and I had to be nasty to her just to get her to give up on me. I could have told her the truth of my gender, but that may have been even more hurtful to her at that point (or so I rationalized). I was scared to death, and never fooled around with dating sites again."

Thanks for your comment! Mine as I said goes back to the very earliest days of the AOL chat rooms.  I was married too of course and somehow had managed to establish a fairly regular "chat" with a person attracted to transvestites in a city not so far away. Even I was very naive and continued the chat until my wife walked in on me one day and found out. I remember it took me weeks to dig out of that predicament  I had put myself into. It was almost as bad as when I was caught sending of Polaroid photo of me cooking in the kitchen all cross dressed up to a "friend" who responded with a perfume scented letter. Again, not what your wife wanted to find in the mailbox. Again I had to promise to never go down that road again. 

My problem was technology stayed one step ahead of me and I began to learn how to contact others. Of course, after my wife passed away, I was free to experiment on line and you have been able to see some of the results I had shared. Looking back on the later experiences, I think I was stood up on so called "dates" in restaurants approximately two out of three times by men. 

However I did much better with women whom I met in person and my future was to be much brighter. 

Zion Moreno

Who is this transgender model?

Add caption

She's about to become a household name.

Zión Moreno stars on the new Mexican Netflix series Control Z, which follows a group of high school students who unfortunately get their secrets spilled to the whole school by a mysterious internet hacker. 

One observant but "socially isolated" student, Sofia, attempts to find out who is behind her classmates' secrets being leaked.

Zión is part of the LGBTQ+ community and reportedly transitioned at a young age. She initially started her career as a model and has since entered the world of acting. She previously appeared on TNT's Claws.

Among Other Things it's Time for Pride

With the world in agony over so many problems, it is still time to pause and remember June is still Pride Month.  The riots over the senseless death of yet another black man have reached close to home around here in Cincinnati with public curfews in the city over the past several nights. The only positive tie in between the unrest and Pride is as you probably remember the "Stonewall" riots in NYC were the beginning of Pride.

Around here too, all the many Pride celebrations have been cancelled until later in the year due to concerns over the virus. 

I simply ask all of you to join with me in remembering all of those who have gone before to secure the very tentative rights we enjoy.

A Transgender Powerhouse

If you hadn't noticed, transgender powerhouse Laverne Cox is and has been a spokesperson for Smirnoff Vodka. Here is one of her latest commercials:

Transer

Over the years there have been several very questionable dating sites which claimed to be for transgender and/or cross dressers to contact others who may be interested. I can't remember even during my "active" dating site days I ever really spent much time trying any of the trans sites. Instead, I tried the other mostly free sites under different titles. On one I would be a woman looking for a woman, on another I would be a man looking for a woman. From there, in my profile, I would point out I was transgender. During this time I was desperately lonely and was fortunate to have a person such as my partner Liz respond to one of my postings on a dating site called Zoosk.. I was very impressed when we started to correspond even after she found out I was transgender. Instead of my "come hither" look which Connie always mentions in my pictures of that era, Liz said I had "sad eyes." Sad eyes or not, we are still together nearly nine years later although I had to go through tons of idiots to arrive at where I am.

All these years later, I do feel we as a transgender population are making strides even with the disaster in Washington so maybe this new trans dating site may be an improvement:

"Transer is a true dating service that allows everyone to showcase their true colors and be accepted and loved for who they are. Designed as a platform for transgender dating, Transer connects men and women around the world looking for romance or love and addresses the many modern challenges of real-world or online dating. To learn more, please visit GoTranser.com."

Transgender Writer

Transgender writer/activist Janet Mock:

Janet Mock 

Making Space

Out of the clear blue (and hot) sky today came a call from my endocrinologist's office. As you may, or may not remember, last week I had my blood labs taken which included my testosterone and estradiol levels. The nurse said my levels had came back this time showing my testosterone was still at a very low level and surprisingly, my "E" levels were just up slightly after increasing the dosage the last time it was checked. So, she suggested we add a third dosage twice a week. Since I am on patches, it means I am going to have to figure out where to add another sizable patch to my abdomen area. I am sure though I will figure it out! After seeing and hearing from a few others who are not satisfied with how the patches are sticking to their skin, I have found somehow I don't have or never have a problem with the patches sticking. I hope I am not jinxing myself since I am excited about being able to increase my dosage slightly. 

We also went back to the mechanic's today to finish our oil change procedure. I say procedure because they couldn't finish the job because of a lack of two filters. Interestingly, Sara Michelle wrote in with this comment:

" Hello Cyrsti! Darling I think you might be taken advantage of? As a former mechanic, the filter is always changed with the oil! Leaving a dirty filter on with fresh oil is a waste of money! They should have made sure they had everything in stock before doing the job! My guess is they will rock you for another oil change when you go back for the filter. Good luck with that bar mitzvah, hope you have fun!"

I always have thought I could be taken advantage of at a mechanic's as a man or a woman! I never had known much about cars. This time though, the two filters were an air filter and a cabin filter recommended by Toyota. Thanks for the heads up and yes I plan on having a good time at the bar mitzfah! 

The Mechanic

The trip to get the oil changed at the mechanic was predictably uneventful. First of all, social distancing was being practiced so there weren't very many customers in the place to start with. Plus the rest of the customers and a few of the employees were all wearing masks. The guys actually doing all of the work weren't so I hope they were not Covid positive. 

All paranoia aside. since we are regulars in the store, no one paid us much mind. They are always happy to see our money. Of course, with our luck, something as easy as an oil change couldn't go over without a hitch. It was filter change time too, and the place didn't have the filters they needed to finish the job. So now we have to go back when the filters get there. 

Now, at the least, we have another excuse to go out somewhere. In other areas too, life is looking as if it may return to a sense of normalcy for us. Liz received a text from her boss today saying she possibly may be going back to work (from home) next week. 

I am looking forward to going out to eat at one of our favorite restaurants one of these weeks. Most places are reopening with guidelines in place. I guess I am fortunate in my self esteem is not connected with how I dress everyday. I know when I wake up who I am. I am unfortunate in that my depression stems from being bi-polar. I have been under it's influence for so long, after a few relapses (such as yesterday) I know what to expect. 

On occasion though, I do feel guilty about not being able to write about the frilly feminine aspects for me being transgender. Reality tells me the next time I will possibly get dressed up will be for my youngest grandson's bar mitzfah which will be coming up on a very limited scale later in June. 

In the meantime, I will have to do with what I have!  

Depression

It's a good thing I had Liz around to talk to yesterday. For some reason, I began to feel the walls close in from our forced quarantine from the world. Along the way too, I have begun to think of what we are going to do as the world begins to open back up. Since summer has finally arrived, I was able to pull out one of my favorite outfits I barely remembered I had. Essentially it's a sleeveless tank top with a satin bow which keeps it fitted together so it can be worn in public. I paired it with a pair of lose fitting culottes. Even the outfit couldn't get me out of my depression. I even fantasized about wearing my semi revealing summer outfit to one of our local lesbian bars. 

Reality soon set in and it was back to thinking ahead to the week ahead after Memorial Day. The only exiting happenings revolve around our cars. I need to take our newer car into the mechanic for an oil change. The older car is much more of a challenge. It has been sitting for quite a while now and needs a new battery (I hope). Assuming we can get the hood open, we have a portable battery jumper we can try out. How's that for excitement? 

Since I am bi-polar, I am used to bouts of depression and how to handle them. Since I have waited this long for things to open back up, it looks like I still have a ways to go to at least get out and about...just a little. 

In the meantime. it seems like at the least boredom is my way of life.