Back in the day, the only way I saw the dawn was from the "other side" of it. Otherwise known as being up all night from working or partying.
This morning was different- a chance for my old dog and I to sit on my porch and watch west as the brightening sky extinguished the string of street lights I could see.
I live on a very busy three lane street so this was a rare chance to experience a time when the loudest sound on this Sunday morning were the birds.
So here I was. Entering six months of hormone replacement therapy on my porch in girl jeans, shoes and t-shirt. Times are a changing. I reach for just some comfortable casual clothes for myself and dog (she doesn't care) and they are female.
Timing is everything and this morning was a great time to just sit and think.
In the next couple of months, I have my next series of doctors appointments coming up. It's time for my regular VA Doc to give me a check up and my private physician to check my hormone situation.
As my very perceptive gf asked yesterday "Was I going to ask for an increase in dosage?"
Yes I am. It's an actually very easy decision. I love the changes I'm going through and the pace I have done it.
My Sunday morning dawn was just a time to check my own soul and one more very important point.
As I enter the last phase of my life (I'm 62), it's important to realize my mortality. I want to believe in Heaven and I do believe we create our own hell. The only fact I know is certain, it's important for me not to take any dawns for granted!
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Early Morning Musings from a Transgender Mind
Number one, I am sooo glad Angel that you and I are on the same page with Barry from Storage Wars. (Former quote of the day).
I thought about providing a link but then thought you may think lesser of my television reality viewing habits. Let's see, where's that remote-I could be missing American Pickers or Pawn Stars.
Maybe I should tell you that it's four in the morning in my world, so even my 2000 channels of television are not producing a wealth of viewing enjoyment. Then again, the Science Channel is featuring a show trying to prove there is intelligent life out there in the universe. Aggravate the aliens and BOOM!
Then again, I'm wondering what the hell I'm doing up anyhow?
Could be the injection of different gender hormones or the changes of age OR the pure excitement of catching the very end of Arlo Guthry's "Alice's Restaurant". Again, I'm not going to bore you with a link. It's just a old hippie movie for old hippies.
Speaking of old hippies, this one had a fabulous day browsing a huge art show yesterday in Cincinnati with a girlfriend. In many ways it was a day of wonder and sensory overload.
The amazing selection of created ceramics, jewelry, sculptures and photography was simply out of this world. (Damn aliens)
I have so much respect of creators of art. Wow! Where does that God given talent come from? Nice!
I was having a wonderful day with a wonderful person, so even the wonder of just being my own boring transgender self didn't even matter.
All right, enough of that. Did you know we all have extra DNA? Yes! What is it for? "We doesn't know it!"
It could be those pesky aliens implanted us all! To think all this time, I was blaming it on my parents!
Here's a thought. What if the aliens have progressed to a essentially genderless state? OMG gender morphing aliens? How's that idea for a Sunday morning radical bible thumping preacher's sermon? The snakes would be getting restless in the back of the church or did I watch too much of the Hatfield & McCoys?
Maybe I am a product of some of that unused DNA or then again a tired restless mind at 4 AM. Now if Swamp People" was on, life would be better!
I thought about providing a link but then thought you may think lesser of my television reality viewing habits. Let's see, where's that remote-I could be missing American Pickers or Pawn Stars.
Maybe I should tell you that it's four in the morning in my world, so even my 2000 channels of television are not producing a wealth of viewing enjoyment. Then again, the Science Channel is featuring a show trying to prove there is intelligent life out there in the universe. Aggravate the aliens and BOOM!
Then again, I'm wondering what the hell I'm doing up anyhow?
Could be the injection of different gender hormones or the changes of age OR the pure excitement of catching the very end of Arlo Guthry's "Alice's Restaurant". Again, I'm not going to bore you with a link. It's just a old hippie movie for old hippies.
Speaking of old hippies, this one had a fabulous day browsing a huge art show yesterday in Cincinnati with a girlfriend. In many ways it was a day of wonder and sensory overload.
The amazing selection of created ceramics, jewelry, sculptures and photography was simply out of this world. (Damn aliens)
I have so much respect of creators of art. Wow! Where does that God given talent come from? Nice!
I was having a wonderful day with a wonderful person, so even the wonder of just being my own boring transgender self didn't even matter.
All right, enough of that. Did you know we all have extra DNA? Yes! What is it for? "We doesn't know it!"
It could be those pesky aliens implanted us all! To think all this time, I was blaming it on my parents!
Here's a thought. What if the aliens have progressed to a essentially genderless state? OMG gender morphing aliens? How's that idea for a Sunday morning radical bible thumping preacher's sermon? The snakes would be getting restless in the back of the church or did I watch too much of the Hatfield & McCoys?
Maybe I am a product of some of that unused DNA or then again a tired restless mind at 4 AM. Now if Swamp People" was on, life would be better!
Friday, June 1, 2012
Quote of the Day
"Technically you aren't late until you arrive."
I love this quote and it isn't even mine!
I will pass it along to those of you (and me) who have been hammered by some in our community for transitioning late in life.
I love this quote and it isn't even mine!
I will pass it along to those of you (and me) who have been hammered by some in our community for transitioning late in life.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Cyrsti's Condo 2nd Anniversary!
Really? Two years?
Isn't there a song with lyrics that go something like this: "Where are they going without over knowing the way?"
What a great description of my life!
Two years ago I knew pretty much I felt really natural as a female. Whatever I perceived it to be.
Being a relatively astute student of my human condition, I knew I had to follow my soul with only the vaguest idea of how to do it.
Two years ago, my personal closet was already open so what was I waiting for?
As it turned out, nothing.
I was fortunate that I had a couple friends who urged me to write about my experiences.
So here we are two years later! Wow!How times have changed. I can safely say our community is more out and active than ever. The best part is the younger transgender generation seems to be in the best shape of all.
I've gone from worrying about everyone elses' perception of me to worrying if I'm perceiving enough of the world.
As a dear friend has told me more than once: "Very few people ever have the chance to reinvent themselves."
How wonderful, humbling and scary the process has become over the last two years.
I wish I could say how much I'm looking forward to celebrating two more years with all of you. The truth of the matter is we are all just as good as seeing the sunrise tomorrow.
Thanks for being around for many sunrises to the east of "Cyrsti's Condo". Let's enjoy a few more together!
Isn't there a song with lyrics that go something like this: "Where are they going without over knowing the way?"
What a great description of my life!
Two years ago I knew pretty much I felt really natural as a female. Whatever I perceived it to be.
Being a relatively astute student of my human condition, I knew I had to follow my soul with only the vaguest idea of how to do it.
Two years ago, my personal closet was already open so what was I waiting for?
As it turned out, nothing.
I was fortunate that I had a couple friends who urged me to write about my experiences.
So here we are two years later! Wow!How times have changed. I can safely say our community is more out and active than ever. The best part is the younger transgender generation seems to be in the best shape of all.
I've gone from worrying about everyone elses' perception of me to worrying if I'm perceiving enough of the world.
As a dear friend has told me more than once: "Very few people ever have the chance to reinvent themselves."
How wonderful, humbling and scary the process has become over the last two years.
I wish I could say how much I'm looking forward to celebrating two more years with all of you. The truth of the matter is we are all just as good as seeing the sunrise tomorrow.
Thanks for being around for many sunrises to the east of "Cyrsti's Condo". Let's enjoy a few more together!
Transgender Commandments
1.- Thou shall not be a victim. The world is full of people with problems. Those that find away to live with them are the success stories.
2.-Thou shall not be a whiner. The world is full of many compassionate people. Attempt to state your case as honestly and truthfully as you can. Falling on your own sword only hurts mostly you.
3.-Thou shall not be a bigot. Just because much of society is bigoted against us, it does not make it right to be bigoted against each other.
4,- Thou shall not turn your back on anyone in our community always remember you were there once..
5.- Thou shall not take yourself too seriously and lose the joy of life.
6.- Thou shall be a positive role model for those in or out of our community-no matter how small the effort.
7.-Thou shall find the courage and the wisdom to do what's right to preserve your existence.
8.-Thou shall find the joy of your existence-how ever small it may be.
9.-Thou shall find those who rejoice in your diversity.
10.- Thou shall be a diva! You deserve it!
2.-Thou shall not be a whiner. The world is full of many compassionate people. Attempt to state your case as honestly and truthfully as you can. Falling on your own sword only hurts mostly you.
3.-Thou shall not be a bigot. Just because much of society is bigoted against us, it does not make it right to be bigoted against each other.
4,- Thou shall not turn your back on anyone in our community always remember you were there once..
5.- Thou shall not take yourself too seriously and lose the joy of life.
6.- Thou shall be a positive role model for those in or out of our community-no matter how small the effort.
7.-Thou shall find the courage and the wisdom to do what's right to preserve your existence.
8.-Thou shall find the joy of your existence-how ever small it may be.
9.-Thou shall find those who rejoice in your diversity.
10.- Thou shall be a diva! You deserve it!
New Post "Over Yonder"
I have passed along the fact I'm doing some writing over on Brianna Austin's TG Reporter site.
The latest one about dealing with neighbors is here.
The latest one about dealing with neighbors is here.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Another Second Anniversary Post
From May 31st, 2010 this is one of my favorite posts. Just keep in mind it was about 5 years old-then!
"Here is one of the stories I sent to a friend and she thought I should share so...Here" ya" go! Direct from alternate life style redneck bars , two stellar tales...of me being me.
The first establishment basically was a female biker bar, not hardcore outlaw women, but a serious crew none the less. The best way I can describe the place was I got the juke box turned off one night when I played Shania Twane "Lord I feel like a Woman." No sense of humor...kind of like the urinal that was made into a planter.
The best pick up line I heard was "you don't look half bad. Maybe I should take you with me and we can see what kind of time we could have."
YAHOO. Me thinks that could have hurt!
Back in those days my wife was still alive and I had to be home around midnight. She got off about that time and I had to be presentable with all signs of makeup gone. Believe me, no amount of jabbering would have saved my place in the house when I told her I was abducted by an alien lesbian.
A kinder and gentler lesbian bar also operated on the same side of town. I made friends there that I'm in touch with today. (5 years later)
One night karaoke was the entertainment. Here she comes...burr haircut, cowboy hat and weighing in at a
conservative 250.
I'm in long blond hair, tight jeans and boots. It occurred to me quickly... it may be about time I started sharpening up my non existent singing skills.
She did ask me to sing, she TOLD me to pick out a song. I thought "is this the way they treat girls in Texas?"
I opted for the only song my male self destroyed after many beers...the romantic ballad
"You don't have to call me Darling, Darling. You don't even call me by my name."
David Allan Coe if you're familiar.(I think he wrote it in jail?)
After we made sweet music (ha) she said "your voice is as low as mine!"
I felt as if I was in a "Lola" song remake, just all twisted up. In this version, I was the guy and she was Lola. Well, I kind of was the guy and she was kind of the girl but backward... when and if she put me on her knee. I thought maybe I could outrun her if I took my boots off!
We parted friends (thank god!) and I don't truly know if she guessed my gender. I had never seen her before or after!
Unfortunately all the pure lesbian bars are closed now in the area. How
sad. I miss drinking free. But more importantly, I won't get to try out
one of my top fantasies...female strippers in a lesbian bar! Dammit!
Mo MO MO! as Billy Idol would say coming up!
"Here is one of the stories I sent to a friend and she thought I should share so...Here" ya" go! Direct from alternate life style redneck bars , two stellar tales...of me being me.
The first establishment basically was a female biker bar, not hardcore outlaw women, but a serious crew none the less. The best way I can describe the place was I got the juke box turned off one night when I played Shania Twane "Lord I feel like a Woman." No sense of humor...kind of like the urinal that was made into a planter.
The best pick up line I heard was "you don't look half bad. Maybe I should take you with me and we can see what kind of time we could have."
YAHOO. Me thinks that could have hurt!
Back in those days my wife was still alive and I had to be home around midnight. She got off about that time and I had to be presentable with all signs of makeup gone. Believe me, no amount of jabbering would have saved my place in the house when I told her I was abducted by an alien lesbian.
A kinder and gentler lesbian bar also operated on the same side of town. I made friends there that I'm in touch with today. (5 years later)
One night karaoke was the entertainment. Here she comes...burr haircut, cowboy hat and weighing in at a
conservative 250.
I'm in long blond hair, tight jeans and boots. It occurred to me quickly... it may be about time I started sharpening up my non existent singing skills.
She did ask me to sing, she TOLD me to pick out a song. I thought "is this the way they treat girls in Texas?"
I opted for the only song my male self destroyed after many beers...the romantic ballad
"You don't have to call me Darling, Darling. You don't even call me by my name."
David Allan Coe if you're familiar.(I think he wrote it in jail?)
After we made sweet music (ha) she said "your voice is as low as mine!"
I felt as if I was in a "Lola" song remake, just all twisted up. In this version, I was the guy and she was Lola. Well, I kind of was the guy and she was kind of the girl but backward... when and if she put me on her knee. I thought maybe I could outrun her if I took my boots off!
We parted friends (thank god!) and I don't truly know if she guessed my gender. I had never seen her before or after!
Unfortunately all the pure lesbian bars are closed now in the area. How
sad. I miss drinking free. But more importantly, I won't get to try out
one of my top fantasies...female strippers in a lesbian bar! Dammit!
Mo MO MO! as Billy Idol would say coming up!
Move Over Jenna!
From the UK:
Angkookrat, known as Toon, was one of 200 'women' who entered Brighton's Next Hot Model contest.
Toon sailed through the preliminary rounds, with her
deep brown eyes, long dark hair and slim figure.
Only after being given the go ahead by the contest judges, "Toon" revealed she was a 26 year old
"Lady Boys of Bangkok Star" and was born male. Contest organizers said: "During the selection process it did not cross any of our minds that she was a man."
Can you blame them?
Angkookrat, known as Toon, was one of 200 'women' who entered Brighton's Next Hot Model contest.
Toon sailed through the preliminary rounds, with her
deep brown eyes, long dark hair and slim figure.
Only after being given the go ahead by the contest judges, "Toon" revealed she was a 26 year old
"Lady Boys of Bangkok Star" and was born male. Contest organizers said: "During the selection process it did not cross any of our minds that she was a man."
Can you blame them?
Monday, May 28, 2012
Not Just Another Transgender Pretty Face!
Yollada "Nok" Suanyot is officially Thailand's highest-ranking
transgender politician
Patrick Winn from the "Global Post" May 28, 2012 04:39
It's official. Yollada "Nok" Suanyot, one of Thailand's more famous
transgender cover girls, has gathered enough votes to become the
country's highest-ranking transexual politician.
According to the Thai-language outlet Matichon
<http://www.matichon.co.th/news_detail.php?newsid=1338119983&grpid=01&catid=&subcatid=>
, Nok, running as an independent candidate, successfully took on a
ruling party candidate in an election deciding who will help govern
their province's "provincial administration organization."
transgender politician
Patrick Winn from the "Global Post" May 28, 2012 04:39
It's official. Yollada "Nok" Suanyot, one of Thailand's more famous
transgender cover girls, has gathered enough votes to become the
country's highest-ranking transexual politician.
According to the Thai-language outlet Matichon
<http://www.matichon.co.th/news_detail.php?newsid=1338119983&grpid=01&catid=&subcatid=>
, Nok, running as an independent candidate, successfully took on a
ruling party candidate in an election deciding who will help govern
their province's "provincial administration organization."
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What Now? More Steps???
Image from Henri Pham on UnSplash As I view my progression into a transgender lifestyle, I see it as a series of steps. In other words once ...
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Amateur, by my definition means a person who does not seriously pursue a certain interest, job or hobby. Ever sense Cyrsti's Condo ...
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I don't find many new womanless pageant pictures floating around the web anymore. I think it's primarily due to the fact that th...