Another Transgender First

 I remember :back in the day" going to Pride carried with it a sense of frustration. Normally the first thing you saw was a group of garish drag queens waving from the back of a decorated truck or convertible. It was all well and good for them but had very little to do with me as a transgender woman. The "T" in LGBT Pride was definitely silent. I didn't let any of that stop me though. I figured at the least I could represent a portion of the transgender community who were just trying to lead an authentic life while at the same time having fun.  

As time went on, more and more trans women and trans men began to attend Pride (at least here locally) and one year recently, a trans woman was selected to lead the Cincinnati Pride Parade. In a few other major locations, such as Los Angeles now the celebration has gone full circle as transgender woman Sharon-Franklin Brown (below) has been named president of the sizable operation.

We have come along way...with such a long way yet to go.

 

Just Another Meeting

 Last night was the monthly get together of the Rainbow Aging Alliance which was completed virtually of course. Nothing really unexpected happened except I was "volunteered" for a virtual Veterans outreach meeting in November. It was fine of course since I am a veteran myself. November is also the month for an "aging summit" hosted by the group which I am also very interested in. There is no word yet on how I could be involved. 

Speaking of being involved, I am going to add in a comment from Connie on the "What Would the Neighbor's Say" Cyrsti's Condo post:

" I remember, all too well, the days (usually nights, under the cover of darkness) I'd have to plan some Mission Impossible episode just to not be detected by neighbors. For a while, that game was as much a part of my gender identity as the clothes I wore. There was some thrill to it, anyway. At some point, though, it became tiresome and felt dirty and dishonest to me. Shortly after my wife and I had come to our "great understanding," I stopped hiding altogether. I even did some major work on the front of our house, exposing my feminine-self to anyone who walked by. One day, as my wife was walking down the stairs from our house, the neighbor across the street shouted out, asking her if it had been her sister working on the house! She replied that it was (deadname) he had seen, and told him my new name. He has called me Connie ever since.

What a relief and a great improvement to my mental health it was to come clean in my coming out. Caring too much about what others may have been thinking of me was definitely not taking too much care of myself."

I can only say Wow! My wife would have divorced me before something similar  to that would have happened. Looking back on it, it could have been the best thing for both of us. Which in all fairness to her, she said. 

Thanks for the comment. 

What Will the Neighbors Say?

 One of the most common problems many transgender - cross dressers face as we begin to explore a feminine world is how to actually leave your door to do it. Unless you are fortunate enough to live in a secluded area, it's quite the problem to just get in your car and go/ Back in the day, during my formative cross dressing years I lived in a highly populated area in a medium sized town where I was quite visible in my male job. 

For all the right reasons, I ended up doing the wrong thing and slowly became recognized as who was to become the true me years later. It finally got so bad, one night when my deceased wife and I went to a party, the DJ who knew me played "Dude Looks Like a Lady." It wasn't too long after that my wife passed away and I was able to live an authentic life. 

These days of course times have changed and I live full time as a trans woman but every now and then I meet a new neighbor during one of my walks. And actually I am on speaking terms with most of them. Except yesterday. New neighbors moved in fairly close down the street and the person I assumed to be the wife decided yesterday would be a good day to stare at me walking down the sidewalk. I figured it was all I needed to have a "Karen" across the street have a problem with me. 

Yesterday was trash pickup day and after she watched me take our containers backup to the house, she decided her curiosity was satisfied. I indeed wasn't trying to steal our trash cans.

It will be interesting if we have any other interactions in the future. 

For you Novice Transgender Women

 This quote fits all of you trying to find your way out of the closet:

The Levels of Transition

Over the years I have experienced several levels of gender transgender transition. The first of which I remember was very early in my life when I experienced moving on from the buzz I received from wearing girls clothes. The thrill quickly faded but the desire to be a girl remained. I didn't realize it for years. It was a significant piece of the gender puzzle of who I was. If I had stayed with clothes being my main goal, I felt I would have stayed more on the cross dressing side of priorities.   

As my life went by, my cross dressing versus transgender existence caused me extreme gender dysphoria. Looking like a woman just wasn't enough and I moved ahead to see if I could live and exist full time successfully as a transgender woman. Much of my process centered around how natural I felt. Of course the answer was I felt very at home in a feminine world. I just had to learn more about it before I could complete my next transition. 

The next transition involved much interaction from other cis women friends who thankfully "adopted" me. I always have told them they showed me more than I could ever say. They pushed me out of my shell further and further as we went everywhere from lesbian mixers to pro football games to women's roller ball derby's. Finally I began to relax and have fun. Still my Mtf gender transition wasn't complete. Then I jumped off the cliff and threw out all my male clothes or sent them to the thrift store.

With my partner Liz's help and with the benefit of HRT on my body, in my own mind I became more of a trans woman than I would have ever thought was possible. In addition to softer skin, longer hair, breasts and now the development of hips, I wonder where I would be without my meds and I am thankful for the health opportunity to accomplish the changes. 

So, even though I have a tendency to think I have reached a transgender plateau as far as my transition goes, I never know what the future may hold as I look ahead to how the remainder of my life may work out.