Hard to Believe

It has been nine months since this blog hit the world wide web thanks to Al Gore.
I thought I would get brave and look back at the first post.
Some three hundred posts later, this was how it all started!
Here is one of the stories I sent to a friend  and she thought I should share so...Here" ya" go! Direct from alternate life style redneck bars , two stellar tales...of me being me.
The first establishment basically was a female biker bar, not hardcore outlaw women, but a serious crew none the less. The best way I can describe the place was I got the juke box turned off one night when I played Shania Twane "Lord I feel like a Woman." No sense of humor...kind of like the urinal that was made into a planter.
The best pick up line I heard was "you don't look half bad. Maybe I should take you with me and we can see what kind of time we could have."
YAHOO. Me thinks that could have hurt!
Back in those days my wife was still alive and I had to be home around midnight. She got off about that time and I had to be presentable with all signs of makeup gone. Believe me, no amount of jabbering would have saved my place in the house when I told her I was abducted by an alien lesbian.
A kinder and gentler lesbian bar also operated on the same side of town. I made friends there that I'm in touch with today. (5 years later)
One night karaoke was the entertainment. Here she comes...burr haircut, cowboy hat and weighing in at a
conservative 250.
I'm in long blond hair, tight jeans and boots. It occurred to me quickly...  it may be about time I started sharpening up my non existent singing skills.
She did ask me to sing, she TOLD me to pick out a song. I thought "is this the way they treat girls in Texas?" 
I opted for the only song my male self destroyed after many beers...the romantic ballad
 "You don't have to call me Darling, Darling.  You don't even call me by my name."
 David Allan Coe if you're familiar.(I think he wrote it in jail?)
After we made sweet music (ha) she said "your voice is as low as mine!"
I felt as if I was in a "Lola" song remake, just all twisted up. In this version, I was the guy and she was Lola. Well, I kind of was the guy and she was kind of the girl but backward... when and if she put me on her knee. I thought maybe I could outrun her if I took my boots off!
We parted friends (thank god!) and I don't truly know if she guessed my gender. I had never seen her before or after!
Unfortunately all the pure lesbian bars are closed now in the area. How
sad. I miss drinking free. But more importantly, I won't get to try out
one of my top fantasies...female strippers in a lesbian bar! Dammit!
Mo MO MO! as Billy Idol would say was coming up!
Some fifty thousand visitors have read all or part of the blog over the past 9 months which is small compared to some but huge in my mind. I would like to thank all of you again for the chance to share a slice of my life with you!

This Says It All!

I wonder on occasion why some of us say or think we don't have a chance with a "real man".  In the majority of cases, the "real man" we don't have any chance with is a gay one.
This letter tells us all why we have a chance!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My first love was a beautiful transsexual
woman and she just loved being a woman so much. She delighted in
frills and satin and lace and stockings and pretty clothes. No one
since has ever appreciated her femininity in the way this special
woman did. She had all the operations years ago and had worked so hard
to get a body that matched her intensely feminine soul. Our
relationship sadly came to an end because of my big promotion and move
to Winnipeg, and her desire to stay in Montreal. Two years have passed
and understandably, she has another man. I have dated some very nice
straight women here but they only dress up on special occasions.
Winnipeg women love their old jeans and comfy clothes. So, I find I'm
not satisfied with the women I meet because they're not the
ultra-feminine woman she was. I miss taking my woman out for Saturday
shopping trips to buy her beautiful things. I guess I got spoiled. If
I advertise I'm transsexual-friendly online I'm going to look weird
and suspect, like I have a strange obsession and might be scary. I am
a straight guy who lucked into meeting my first love, and hope to meet
a similar lady who enjoys living in Winnipeg, which will be my home
now. I just want that kind of woman who's kind of an old-fashioned
southern belle. Help! -- Vive La Difference, Wpg.
This comes from the "Winnepeg Free Press"
Cyrsti

Slip Slding Away.

Enjoyed a super evening last night  A friend and I got together for some adult beverages and some electronic trivia. She and I are both relatively competitive and immediately developed a grudge against the best trivia player in the pub. We  did manage to beat him once or twice!
As the night progressed, the other patrons kind of faded into the background. I was not worried about being "spotted" I was just me.
On occasion I did look around (as any one would) and again there was nobody looking back I felt entirely comfortable and secure in my skin.
As I always do, I had to spend some serious "think" time on the whys and hows of the evening.
One fact stands out, attitude ranks somewhere up there with looks if you are in my gender situation.
During the day, I was chatting back and forth with a trans woman who has gone the "SRS" route.
By the time I was getting ready to go out, I was convinced I had no chance of not getting laughed out of everywhere I went. After all, I had not gone through all the needed electrolysis and hormones to make my face smooth as silk. She was right, I hadn't! But, it didn't matter. My beard doesn't really show and I guess my pores didn't matter. I was home. I was who I was supposed to be.
As the room and all the people sort of slid away my girl thought.... life was good!