Transgender Ally's

Saturday was National Daughters' Day. Along the way here in Cyrsti's Condo, I have not been shy writing about my daughters acceptance of her transgender parent. 

Liz (left) and my daughter. Credit Cyrsti Hart

I was fortunate when not only did my daughter accept me, she wanted to help me. On occasion she tried to go too far. She was going to help me with my wardrobe and appearance. As I recently wrote about, she gifted me an appointment to her decidedly upscale hair salon. As I said before she came with me and added another layer to me being equally excited and terrified. I distinctly remember the second time I went back for a cut and color and suffered the "sticker shock" of being presented a bill for 175 dollars, not including tip. Due to financial considerations, it was my last visit there! Plus, I moved away. 

Of course my most influential dealing with allies came when I started to actually present my feminine self to the world. I made a couple of cis woman friends through my dealings at a local sports bar I went to and met my current partner Liz on an on line dating site. Liz essentially became my most influential ally when she told me to live totally as a transgender woman because she had always seen me as a woman. 

Over the years though, not unlike almost everything else in the transgender world, allies have come under scrutiny. It's become more difficult for potential trans allies to comprehend the intricacies of pronoun usage as an example. Plus just imagine if you were on the outside looking in and trying to understand the always evolving alphabet in the LGBTQ+ spectrum. Then again, what if your child is trying to tell you they are gender fluid? 

Somewhere along the way I think we have lost some of our perspective on what an ally actually is. As in everything else in our world, being an ally evolves too.

In the meantime, I love my daughter Andrea and my partner Liz very much! 
  

Fall has Fallen

 Finally it looks like what is called Indian Summer around here has come and gone. Indian summer describes the last gasp of summer like weather. It's always been a pleasant time for me, as it's the time I take to re-assess my fall wardrobe of light weight sweaters, leggings and even boots. 

Early Denim Skirt Picture
Credit: Cyrsti Hart

Early looks into my wardrobe tell me it's time to do some shopping. Not only do I need some new key pieces, I need some new jeans in a smaller size. The diet is working plus my hips are continuing to change due to hormone replacement therapy. Since my very early days of transgender transition, I have never liked the idea of extensive shapewear, Relying totally on the what you see is what you get theory. For the most part I think it worked. Plus my favorite outfit was a long patterned top paired with a jean skirt. Since everyone told me I had good legs it made sense to show them off. 

Even back then, I was doing dieting and managed to shed nearly fifty pounds from the 275 I weighed when I started to seriously transition, 

All of this takes me back to my current dilemma of having a fall wardrobe deficit. Thanks to my cats claws, she has effectively ruined several pairs of leggings which I wear. Leggings fortunately, are a relatively inexpensive replacement item. After deeper inspection, I found I could use a couple more sweaters to wear.  Since I am a big thrift store shopper, it may be time for another trip. 

Seasonal wardrobe changes have always been fun for me. One of my favorite times to be a transgender woman. Being full time as long as I have been now just adds to the challenges.

Transgender Decision in Thailand

 

Thailand is considering whether to deport a transgender businesswoman who was convicted this month of illegal entry and is wanted in Malaysia for insulting Islam, a case that has put a spotlight on Malaysia's approach to gender identity.

Cosmetics company owner Nur Sajat, (above) as she prefers to be known, fled from Malaysia this year. Thai police confirmed that Sajat was arrested this month and was found guilty by a court of illegal entry and subsequently released on bail.

In Malaysia, she faces up to three years in jail and or a fine for dressing as a woman at a religious event in 2018, which she pleaded not guilty to, according to news reports.