Teaching the Teacher?

 Yesterday was therapy day. I have mentioned many times here in Cyrsti's Condo how long I have been with my VA therapist. She is my original therapist with the VA who helped me with my hormone replacement therapy program as well as the paper work to get my legal name change rolling. In other words, a long time. 

During most sessions she asks me about the blog and this session our discussion here on "Confidence" caught her attention. Yesterday, it really did when I quoted the conversation here by saying "Confidence is our one greatest accessory." She was so impressed, she wrote it down. 

Most of the time I forget I have to backtrack with her and explain what I am saying. An example would be the process we transgender women and men go through to live a new life as our authentic selves. According to Connie, it's a wall:

"  I remember much discussion, here on CC, about sitting on the wall (straddling the fence). That may be one degree past being up against the wall, but it's where many of us end up for far too long. Once I had built up enough nerve to make the jump to the other side, I found it to be a soft landing - and I have walked confidently on this side of the wall ever since."

Thanks for the comment! I always referred to my "wall" as a slippery slope. The more I experimented living in a feminine world, sure it was scary but it felt so natural. Finally I made the decision to permanently put my male persona in the closet and live 24/7 as a transgender woman. 

Perhaps the teacher will learn just a little more to help the next novice trans person she encounters. I keep telling my therapist to consider just the smallest gender aspect of her life she takes for granted and reverse it. Another example would be when she wakes up in the morning. She has the gender privilege of knowing she is a woman. Most of us knew it too but had to really work to express it. 

It's really wonderful when the teacher learns too. 

Finally an old picture. 

This picture taken after my first trip to a real woman's  hair solon. A birthday gift from my daughter. from 2015.

 

Transgender Winner

 For the first time in the pageant's history, the title of Miss Nevada  has been won by a transgender woman.

Kataluna Enriquez was crowned the winner Sunday in Las Vegas. The 27 year old won the Miss Silver State pageant in March. It was the preliminary for this pageant. 

If she wins the completion in  November, she joins Spain's Angela Ponce as the seconder transgender woman ever to compete in the Miss Universe pageant. 

Transgender Confidence?

 Emma wrote into Cyrsti's Condo with a wonderful comment on how to go about achieving confidence as you enter the feminine world:

" Indeed, I agree completely that confidence is our best accessory. But how does one gain confidence? For those of us who're used to just living authentically what can we advise others?

I think there are a couple of things:
1) As you progress through the world, grocery shopping, doing the mundane things, look around and notice, especially those who you wouldn't normally pay attention to. I know I'm drawn to those I admire, such as pretty, small, young. The truth is that the world is full of a huge variety of people. The message: people just don't notice most others.

2) Do you remember the song "Almost Cut My Hair" by Crosby, Stills, and Nash? In it they sing about letting their "freak flag fly." While we're certainly not freaks it's fair and okay to just put ourselves out there and be, as we are.

3) For most of us, no amount of makeup, padding, and other stuff is going to make us blend in seamlessly. So, get over it. Lose the excessive makeup. No one wears it, and just having all that on your face calls unwanted attention. Again, pay attention to the women you see and present in a similar way according to your own taste.

4) When it comes down to that moment of taking the first step out, consider this mantra that I used to repeat to myself:

"Whenever we feel fear, it means we’re up against some kind of wall … on the other side of the wall is some kind of freedom."

Get to the freedom. It's worth it."

As I said, a wonderful comment! Thanks Emma!

Once you get to the freedom, there is nothing like it.