Reality?

From Connie:

Reality shows.....Mostly show, not much reality. I've given up watching them, and even my curiosity toward this one is not enough to cause me to bother looking for a stream. The only reality I can vouch for is my own, but it still leads me to believe that whatever causes one to have an identity inconsistent with their "assigned" gender is a lifetime condition. I am not completely satisfied with the term, "transition", anyway, but I definitely don't believe that it can be used in the past tense - nobody really finishes a gender transition. I have been considering using the word, "transposition", instead, for my own situation.

 I think that it more accurately describes my own gender process, as its definition can be a reordering or realigning that causes change; not only the change itself. Besides, my fondness of making plays on words leads me to coin a new one: "Trans-position". That is, the relative place one might find herself on the sliding gender scale. I know that I have been sliding on that binary scale my whole life, slowly moving past the center-point toward female enough that I could never slip back so far as to be on the male side again. I know this because I have reached an awareness of self without external influence, and I have accepted the fact that I am who I am based on where I am now, as well as have been in the past.

 I'm confident, as well, that where I'll be in the future will be determined by who I am at the time - not as a result of any chemical or surgical influence. I haven't entirely ruled those influences out (health reasons are impediments at this time), but any decision I may make toward them will always be so much more with consideration to who I am than what I think I need. "What I think I need" is the core of the trouble ahead of which you speak. My word play will call that "Trans-supposition".

I guess my "transposition" came during the years I decided to not be a cross dresser-but a woman. I had to see if it was possible at all and did I want to do the Mtf transition. It's tough to follow because  so many people get caught up in the semantics.  Take the show for example, not once did they allude to the fact the dictated weight loss had any think to do with appearance instead of a healthy major surgery. Which, I thought was good. 

Plus, as you said in essence, gender is more of a slippery slope than any of us imagined. I too, have no desire to go back to my male side-no matter how much easier life would be.  (Perceived)

I was lucky. I had friends who could see the real me and kick me down the slippery slope, off the cliff and catch me at the bottom.

Finally, I like the comment "No one ever really finishes a gender transition." 

Ready or Not-Here We Go!

2017 has made it's appearance.

For me, not a real good one so far, but we all know that will change.

New Years Eve turned out to be windy with rain and snow mixed, so we just stayed home and watched The Ohio State Buckeyes get positively demolished by the Clemson Tigers. The pot of home made chili tasted great though!

Later on that evening, Liz's son came home very sick and managed to pass it along to Liz early today. (At press time, I am surviving well-knock on wood!)

So, our gift certificates I purchased for New Years Eve are still good of course, my new dress can be worn for another occasion and life goes on.

De-Transitioning?

Several nights ago on the TLC Network, they shared a show about two transgender people. One a trans woman, the other a trans man.

To make a long story short, the transgender woman had a SRS surgery scheduled with the renowned surgeon Marci Bowers. But she had to lose around 50 pounds before the surgery could take place. The show then moved to a gym where the trans woman was going to try to lose the weight with a personal trainer. As it turned out, to no avail. For whatever reason (and there could be several) she gave up losing the weight and even de-transitioned for a span of time before reverting back to more of a gender fluid life.

I thought the show was interesting because I can't tell you all the times I look at a guy and just want to be a no strings attached male. Life would have been such an easier journey.

Having written that though, I know the hell I went through just trying to live up to my demands of being "a guy." Plus, after bringing my journey as far as I have, I would have to be dragged (no pun intended) back into that world.

So I can see both sides of the fence on this per norm. (Cheers?) But I don't care what Norm says, I could never de-transition.

By the way, the person on the show is a lot like me. I thought she made a realistic if not knock down beautiful woman before she seemingly gave up on the SRS. Also there is the line of thought I subscribe too that if you have to rely on a shiny new vagina to prove who you are, there will be trouble ahead anyhow.

I had a difficult time finding out if there would be a follow up episode to her story or not. A lot of ground was covered in this show including the specter of suicide, a transgender wedding (man and trans woman) as well as other story lines.

My best advice is to follow the link above to see if you can stream it.