Thanks Ladies

This morning my daughter and I got together for a quick coffee and pastry during a break from her insanely busy schedule. 

When we went up to the counter to order, the counter person said- "can I help you ladies?" Of course I never tire of hearing that, except this time it was the first time I heard it with my daughter. I do believe I saw a bit of a smile on her face! 

Wow!

"Passed By?"

Most certainly , the second thing we do after donning women's or girl's clothes for the first time is find a mirror to admire ourselves in. From that moment on, the mirror becomes our friend or enemy. I have always thought making the MtF gender transition from cross dresser to transgender woman in the world passes through the mirror.

Of course as we know, the mirror has a pesky level of fibbing to human beings as a whole-not just cross dressers or trans women. We look wonderful in the mirror only to be "clocked" at every turn in the real world.

These days though, the world seems to be changing in our direction-for the best. I'm going to let Connie tell her story which is so similar to mine:

" I began thinking this morning about "passing privilege" after visiting the doctor's office for yet another blood draw. The girl at the front desk was not the one I have been encountering thus far, but she was good about being careful to address me properly. I assume that she had me read before I even gave her my name (she only asked for my last name at first). So, I guess I wasn't passing, but I was recognized as a trans woman who was serious about it. 

As I sat in the waiting room, I revisited the notion of "passing" in my mind. In fact, that's where it lies in the first place - in MY mind; not anyone else's. Even if I don't actually "pass" as a woman, then, it is my attitude and self-confidence that relay the notion that I am, at least, "passable" (or a reasonable facsimile) to those with whom I engage. In other words, my "pass-ability" comes from within me (with a bit of help from cosmetics and clothing on the outside), while others see from that the "possibility" of my womanhood. As such. I am so much more often treated by others as they would treat any woman. As they say, the possibilities are endless, but we, as trans women, must open ourselves up to them. If we're constantly concerned with being "passable", we limit what is "possible". I see myself as having the "right" to be who I am; I see the "privilege" belonging to those who meet me!"

All I can add is, you will know all of this when it happens and it takes a lot of patience to get here!
 

The Right or Wrong Person for the Job?

I really don't know how many times I have sworn myself off the "allure" or lack of it from Caitlin Jenner. 

Kristin Beck 

Of course I know the non negotiables. Without a doubt she is the biggest public relation's splash ever in the transgender community. Now we have a former Olympic hero along with Navy Seal Kristin Beck as recent "coming out" stories. In fact, Kristin is running for US Congress.

I am sure Jenner's life will ever allow her to ever experience the everyday lives we live as transgender women. Can you imagine the paparazzi crowding into a women's restroom with her?

After watching her last show rater intently (and knowing it's a glossy over produced Kartrashian show) I couldn't see the emotion in Jenner. Again, I don't know all the facts about her, except she went out and bought the best plastic surgery money could buy. Again, maybe that's why I can't see any emotion in her face-she can't move it!!!!

Plus, I have no idea how long she has been back on HRT. It took me three years on hormones to begin to see the world in a different way. When I watch Jenner, I wonder if she has passed over (no pun intended) to the feminine side much at all. She tries to overtalk most people and doesn't want to listen for the real problems-typical male.

Then again, maybe I am just watching the true quandary of a Mtf gender transition play out with Jenner. I don't question the pure persistence and strength it takes to jump the gender fence. It will be interesting to see in the years to come what happens with Jenner. Will a "softer-gentler" Caitlin truly begin to enjoy a life in the girls sandbox? Or, will the ego trip of doing it still be more important?