Out in the Testosterone World

Hair by JJ Hart, Beret hand beaded
by "Liz T Designs" 

Just a short post today as I just returned from braving a testosterone heavy environment. More precisely, it was time to get the oil changed in our car, which was slightly overdue. By the time I was done, I wished I had a dime for every tattoo I saw on the completely male staff.

For some reason, any trip to a male dominated (such as auto workplace) has always caused my gender dysphoria to flare up. Even after all these years that I have been out as a transgender woman, I still feel the same trepidation. Which makes me feel even more frustrated with myself.

This morning, as I pulled the car into the next available bay to be serviced, I cannot be sure, but I think the manager called me the dreaded “Sir”. But, as the work progressed, he became increasingly nice to me. I never know if it is the result of age privilege but at least he never called me “Sir” again. Very soon I was on my way to my next stop which was the coffee drive thru for wake-up drinks for my wife Liz and I encountered yet another young man at the drive thru window who was at least honest with me. I asked him how he was doing, and he said he was looking for a cot to lay down on to take a nap. I just looked at him and before I could say anything, he quickly said what I was thinking. He was working in a coffee shop, stop and get a cup to wake up.

One way or another, we made small talk, and I was again on my way, this time back home and he had acted as if nothing was wrong with how I was presenting as a transgender woman.

At least, the short trip out this morning into a potentially difficult world built my confidence up that I could do it again when my wife Liz and I go on an extended vacation to New England in approximately a month. A vacation which will challenge me in many ways including restroom privileges.

The end result of this morning was, I need more public adventures into potentially difficult situations to enable me to build the all important confidence I used to have when I was spending more time in the world.