Ripley, Ohio. Courtesy Cyrsti Hart |
The reason I bring it up comes from an experience I had yesterday at the auto repair sh
op. Along the way I have never totally gotten over my internal fears of going unattended to a male dominated business such as a auto repair shop.
Yesterday though, my fears (and gender dysphoria) were quickly put to rest when the male clerk said "Can I help you Mam" From there I checked my car in and waited for my oil change to be completed.
From the opening comment on, for the rest of the day, I took advantage of an all to brief wave of gender euphoria.
As I started to look back in my my life, I really did have more than several euphoric moments as I went on an exciting yet terrifying journey to living as my authentic gender self. From the earliest days as a kid staring into a mirror at the feminine girl looking back at me, all the way to the occasions at lesbian mixers when I was approached and flirted with. When my two lesbian friends couldn't seem to generate any interest.
As I look back at my life also, I see the times of gender euphoria coming along often just at the right times which I needed to keep moving along. All the times when I was sent home crying due to cruel comments and harassments. Of course too, as I mentioned in a recent post, there was the physical gender euphoria which came with my hormone replacement therapy.
I could write another post (or two) on episodes of euphoria which encouraged me to keep going down the path to living full time as a transgender woman. Many of them revolved around Halloween, which I will try to write about before the holiday is upon us.
In the meantime, the only words of wisdom I may try to come up with is, try to feel and cherish any incidents of gender euphoria you may have. They could keep you going.
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