Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

 

Good News...Almost

This holiday season, for the first time ever, LGBTQ characters are beginning to show up in made for television movies on major networks such as the "Hallmark Channel." Overall, seven were mentioned in the post I read. The photo below comes from the "Christmas House." 

That's all well and good as the "G" is featured as a subplot in the show, the "T" in all the shows featured for their diversity, only one had a transgender character, Candis Cayne..  (below). It's called "I Hate New Years"

I suppose it is a start. Of more interest to the transgender community would be a story of how a trans character gathered her courage and came out to her family during a holiday family get together. My confession is I never had the courage to do it. When I told my brother and sister in law who inherited the annual dinner by default when my wife died about me being transgender, they basically told me not to come as my true self. That was it, I haven't seen them since. On the other hand, here is Connie's experience:

" It was a Thanksgiving Day, more than a few years ago, that I made my physical appearance as my true self to my family. My "secret" had long been let out by that time, but it was also past time that I should have normalized myself to those most dear to me. For myself, it had become abnormal to keep my female and male selves separate - because they had actually become melded into the person I am. As normal as I felt my womanhood was to me, it would never be normalized until it could be perceived as normal by others - especially by my family. While it is one of the regrets I have that I never made an attempt to normalize the relationship with my mother as her daughter, it was my desire to not have further regrets, after her death, that I felt the need to be completely open with the rest of my family."

Thanks for the comment! 

Maybe next year, The Hallmark Channel will feature a story like Connie and my story will be much different.  The "T" will be better represented in the LGBTQ community.

Thanksgiving

 In the United States at least it's time to formally begin the holiday season and celebrate Thanksgiving. In the pre-covid days it was a day to get together with family, over eat and watch sports.

In my pre-transition days, my deceased wife took great pride in inviting the whole family over and doing most of the cooking. Which meant to me a marathon cleaning effort to prepare for the big event. Even though I didn't really want to be too involved with the cooking, my experience in the restaurant business led me to being the one who carved the turkeys. Because we  needed more than one. So secretly I felt closer to the women who were clustered in the kitchen. Plus I admired what they were wearing of course. 

In my post transition, covid bubble days, my Thanksgiving family has shrunk to only three people in our bubble.  In the past we have been able to spend the holiday with my daughter's in laws and my grand-kids but not this year. It's too risky.

Every year at this time too, I think of all of those in the LGBTQ community whose families have deserted them. In fact, the "Gen Silent" documentary I just watched reminded me of the stark reality faced by many who grow old and alone. From out and proud to back in the closet. On the bright side (and there is one) more and more communities are organizing LGBTQ groups who are reaching out to those in need of attention. 

I myself am blessed with many things to be thankful for. Of course number one is the support group I have been able to build around me. The group includes my partner Liz, my daughter Andrea, my three grand kids and basically her entire family of in laws. Ironically, I am one of two transgender individuals in their extended family.

And, in a totally different direction, I am thankful for all of you who stop and visit Cyrsti's Condo. It means a lot...thank you!

Where ever you may be this year, have a safe Thanksgiving!

Transgender First in Mexico

 

Victoria Volkova is the First Trans Woman on 'Playboy Mexico’ Cover

When the Norm Becomes the Norm

 As transgender women and/or crossdressers, we spend much of our lives wondering how we ended up being a person who has such non normal urges. Or so we feel. I know I lived so many years wondering how I was the only one I knew who had the peculiar habit of wanting to cross dress in clothes of the opposite sex (women). Then, first I learned through magazines such as "Transvestia" which was started by "Virginia Prince" in the 1960's and later through the internet, I was far from being alone.

However, the feelings of normalcy persisted. I finally learned no one was truly "normal" and I learned to embrace my true self. Last night, during another virtual meeting of the transgender/cross dresser support group I am part of, I found out once again how normal I wasn't. Out of the ten or so attendees last night, I was the only one who made it to the point where I live full time as a transgender woman. Many of the others were really bemoaning the fact their weekend trips out as a cross dresser had been seriously curtailed, or stopped all together by the virus. I too, don't like it but the fact remains I know what gender I am when I wake up in the morning. 

To look at the process from a different angle, let's bring in Connie:

"I was reminded of Transgender Week of Awareness last Friday, when a local newscast mentioned it. At first, I thought it was funny to start a week on a Friday, but then I realized it is so that it would culminate on the third Friday of November - which is Transgender Day of Remembrance. I actually joked to my wife that it was a good thing for the news to remind me that I was trans, and needed to be made aware of it. Really, though, I don't think there are any activities in Seattle until tomorrow - TDOR. That will be virtual this year.

By the way, about that joke I made to my wife: She said that she doesn't think of me as trans very often, anymore. I guess that maybe one can be so aware that it just becomes the norm. As I like to say: When the extraordinary becomes ordinary, that is truly an extraordinary thing!"

Indeed Connie, it is an extraordinary thing. I'm sure the two of us are not the norm in finding spouses who accept us so totally. The norm becoming the norm is truly an extraordinary thing.