Suicide With a Cat's Perspective

Over the years, I have read and seen all too many posts concerning suicide brought on by transgender gender dysphoria. The title of the post is the same as the title of this post and can be found in it's entirety here.  Many of you regulars here in Cyrsti's Condo know I led a very self destructive life which led to my own suicide attempt, These days I have a very sound support system with my partner Liz, my daughter and two mental health professionals provided by the Veteran's Administration because I am Bi-Polar. Through it all, I realize how fortunate I am. I know there are many of you who live in despair. Here is an very small excerpt from the mentioned post to maybe help you:

"You are not a failure.

Just because you are transgender, does not make you broken- you do not need fixing.  There is nothing wrong with you.  You are a human in the wrong physical body, but with the strongest, most precious soul and I see you and you are beautiful.

You are not your thoughts and you are not other people’s thoughts.  They can tell you that you are crazy; they can tell you that you are wrong.  You can tell yourself that this is too hard or that you are not worthy of being the person you desire to be.  Or, you can practice watching these thoughts come in and go out and let yourself be worthy of life. 

Be impeccable with the words you speak about yourself and others because those words become the general consciousness of society; every time you define, judge, criticize and belittle yourself, you are contributing to the creation of the same world that hurts you so much."

This was taken from the final blog post of a transgender woman in Scotland. Aside from being on the brink of suicide myself, I don't consider myself a trained professional expert on the subject. My advice to all of you is perhaps you can reach out to a local LGBT group for help resources. 

Always remember too, what is true today, doesn't have to be true tomorrow. Take my life as an example. Everything and everybody around me who were dear to me died off (literally) in a three year period and deep down inside I believed somehow I deserved it. All of a sudden my life started to change and I found myself where I am today.

Life is a series of rebuilding projects and believe in yourself to make it.

 

The Trinity

Spoiler alert, this is a very shallow post and it reality it has nothing to do with being transgender. It's actually about being on hormone replacement therapy. (HRT) It's my belief you don't have to rely on drugs and/or surgery to calm your trans feelings. For that matter, you can look like a man with a full beard walking around who feels between her ears she is a woman. The tricky part comes when a person tries to "sync" up  what's going on inside with what they are projecting to the outside world. Since I am not planning on any surgeries, HRT was my only path to helping my feminine presentation with the public.

By now, perhaps you are wondering what any of this has to do with the title of this post.  Another of my not so guilty pleasures I have is watching any and all of the PBS television networks' cooking shows but Vivian Howard's Somewhere South is my current favorite. She is a Southern Chef who also does quite a bit of work with other feminine chefs and features the bond between women. Which of course I am always quite interested in, since I am not much of a cook. Fortunately, my partner Liz is. If you know anything about cooking, the "trinity" is normally made up of onions, peppers and celery (if you are cooking Cajun style).

My own personal HRT trinity is hair, skin and breasts. It's what I rely heavily on when I wake up in the morning. It ties in with my brain and tells me I am a feminine person. Like so many of you, I spent most of my life wondering where I fit on the gender spectrum. I am well aware of the trinity could well be temporary since I have to rely on continued good health to stay on the regimen. 

So I try to be thankful everyday.

Not Good Enough

Perhaps you have read somewhere by now, the Navy has given a waiver to serve for a stellar transgender active duty person. As you probably remember, for no good reason (except pleasing his red neck base) the liar in chief banned all transgender troops from serving. Since I am a transgender veteran myself, this story really hits home.

Now. “The acting Secretary of the Navy has approved a specific request for exemption related to military service by transgender persons and persons with gender dysphoria,” Navy spokeswoman Lt. Brittany Stephens told CNN. 

Here is more from the LGBTQ Nation: “This service member requested a waiver to serve in their preferred gender, to include obtaining a gender marker change in (the Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System) and being allowed to adhere to standards associated with their preferred gender, such as uniforms and grooming.”

The unnamed officer came out after the ban went into effect in June 2019. They were represented by the National Center for Lesbian Rights(NCLR)  and GLBTQ Legal Advocates & Defenders (GLAD).

“The ban has been in place for over a year and this is the first waiver to be granted,” said Jennifer Levi, GLAD Transgender Rights Project Director. “While we are relieved that our client, a highly qualified Naval officer, will be able to continue her service, there are other equally qualified transgender service members who have sought waivers and are still in limbo, despite being perfectly fit to serve. Dedicated military service members shouldn’t have to bring a lawsuit to be able to continue doing their job.”

“There is no basis for treating transgender service members differently by requiring them to seek a waiver that no one else has to obtain in order to continue to serve,” said Shannon Minter, NCLR Legal Director." “While we are relieved for our client, requiring transgender service members to jump through this discriminatory hoop makes no sense and only underscores the irrationality of the ban. Being transgender has nothing to do with a person’s fitness to serve, and transgender individuals should be held to the same standards as other service members.”

Hopefully, in November, the people will speak and the crook in chief be be voted out!