"Left Handed Mail"

Two comments from my recent blog post "What Makes a Woman" from the "UK Huffington Post."
The first from Paula:

1. The problem with the child bearing ability definition is that would include a lot of Trans Men!
2. Good point! I wonder what the so called "purists" think about the trans men who keep all their reproductive organs to have a child or transgender women who have their sperm frozen for possible impregnation of a woman at a later date?
3. FABULOUSCONNIEDEEJanuary 30, 2017 at 2:03 PM

   I disagree with the article's insinuation that the "very real feeling" equates to "You just are." They are not the same thing, although attempting to make them so may be the only way to explain gender identity to the average person. The problem is that to assume they are the same diminishes the validity of the "just are" premise. Certainly, accepting that oneself is left-handed or dyslexic comes from no feeling, albeit there are very real feelings that can emerge as a result of those things.
   
   One of the most disturbing things people relate to me is that they accept (or reject) my choice to act on my feelings of being a woman. Oftentimes, I am even congratulated for my courage to act on my feelings - or to be as I feel myself to be. Yes, I have a feeling of being true to myself through this transition, but it is really more due to the release of the bad feelings I have had in the past than the good feelings I get from my feminine expression. Still, my gender identity is not a feeling anymore than a cis woman's female gender is to her. The difference is that I am forced to be conscious of the same thing she may take for granted. It is that fact that creates the "feelings".

Thanks Connie and Paula :)

Just What the Hell Was I Thinking???

As I think back on my "Life Turns on a Dime" series of blog posts,  I did briefly think What the hell..etc?

I know many of you here in Cyrsti's Condo have gone through or are going through what I have/did and it is a cup half full or empty experience.

The half empty/negative experiences were the tears we shed to get to the places we are today. The half full experiences were simply we made it. We are the survivors of life's toughest climb. Looking down from Mt. "Genderest" gives us a unique view of society that very few humans are allowed to experience. Who doesn't want to re-event themselves?

Still, the transgender experience continues to be shunned by the majority of a mis-understanding society. Often, simply because we can not blend as well as we would like. Until you reach the point of "forced stealth", or when one lives her trans life on her own terms and the hell with the world.

I will say though, life on my end is getting easier. Not so much from a presentation viewpoint but from the public viewing me with a pleasant surprise. Not a mocking or mean response.

We simply didn't have a choice but to embark on the climb we made, We just had to do it or join the extremely high suicide attempts in our tribe.

So what the hell was I thinking? Survival!!!

What Makes a Woman?

Good question right? Now I have seen in various circles the questions rise again on rather trans women are "allowed" to use the "woman" word alone anymore or ever.

The easiest answer and the one most completely wrong is "child bearing ability" alone makes a woman. The problem with the idea comes with all the cis women born without the ability or will power to have children. Does that make them any less a woman? No.

Transgender women have just had a different path to express their femininity. Our femininity lies in the same places a cis woman's does- between her ears and in her heart. Gender identity is not about your physical sex or the clothes you wear but an innate sense of who you are.

Sooner more than later (maybe) society is going to understand we (transgender women and men have been around since ancient times and allow us to go our own way without roadblocks and recently:

“The medical profession has tried - and failed - for over 100 years to change the brains of trans people, in a bid to make their gender identity congruent with their body. Most clinicians now agree that the best solution is to realign people’s bodies to more closely match their gender identity, not the other way around.”

The UK Huffington Post recently carried an article which I have quoted from ( here ) Of interest is the fact feminists are once again attempting to distance themselves from the trans woman community for mainly the scientific failures mentioned above.

What I also don't understand is why now with attacks rising on women of all types (physical and legal,) feminists don't want to add to strength in numbers, our numbers.

Finally from the "Huffington Post" : “Being transgender should not be seen as an attempt to invalidate or diminish womanhood (or indeed manhood) any more than being gay should be seen as an attempt to diminish heterosexuality - they are just different experiences deserving equal acceptance and respect.

“Science cannot fully explain the experience of being trans. The suggestion that seems most likely is a neurological difference in the same way as dyslexia or left-handedness. It is a very real feeling which has been known in every culture throughout history.
“One does not need to understand it to simply accept that it is. The fact is no trans people can explain why they feel as they do. How do you explain why you are left-handed? You just are.