Training the Therapist?

Well, what turns out to have been my last VA therapist visit for awhile, went very much without any amazing results.  I don't think therapy in essence is designed to have instantaneous mind blowing results. (No pun intended-yes it was!)

In yesterday's Cyrsti's Condo post, I mentioned perhaps offhandedly about not thinking my therapist may be qualified to talk to me.  Michellewhois (Thanks!!!) mentioned in a comment, I could request another. It turned out my therapist is leaving the VA for greener pastures and I didn't have to-if I wanted and she offered. I respectively declined. Historically, for the most part, I have been able to balance the many facets of my life without therapy. Please remember though, to each their own as far as therapy goes.

Perhaps the most meaningful part of the visit grew out of when she told me "I seemed 'more grounded.' (Remember, I did my first session with her in guy drag.) I just said, I am more grounded now because I have very simply "synced" my gender with my outside self.  The conversation "morphed" into perhaps I had a bit of an easier time of transitioning into a feminine lifestyle because of my previous experiences working with groups of generics.  Specifically, power structure differences between the genders. 

All of this lead us into coming up with her three major male gender influences-or what men really care about (other than sex). I don't remember her other two, but I added power to her list. After all, it has been a very relevant topic following the release of the "Fifty Shades of Gray" movie.  I just told her, like so many aspects of a guy's life, power is a much simpler concept than a woman's. Just toss in equal parts of physical and financial powers and pretty much you got it.  The sublets of athletic prowess and looks fall into the physical parts and the financial speaks for itself.  Yet another benefit of working through a MtF gender transitioning I told her, was watching men. Interact in their world-one which is no longer mine.

So, that was it.  On another bright side, my primary doctor's lead nurse literally ran into me in the hall and she was able to update all of what has been happening with me within the VA.-a highly desirable deal!!  Before the day was over however, people watching was very much back into my thoughts. Not with men though, but with a generic (I assume).  More coming up!

Therapy?

Today is my second therapist appointment of the winter. Actually, looking back, only having to reschedule twice since January isn't too bad considering our weather.

I have a problem with therapist appointments. Are they supposed to talk?  Get me started jabbering and I dominate without thinking about anything else. Last time I even stopped and asked the therapist if she was supposed to talk? The problem I have with therapy sessions are-what are we having them about?  In my case, actually, being transgender is just a small part of why I'm there. Everything else in my world is what has a tendency to get in my way.  As I think about it though, much does come from reestablishing myself in the world in the gender I always wanted to be.  Yesterday, I even locked up in a conversation with my sister in law concerning the internal changes of HRT on me.  She asked what? After stuttering around I finally said, it's a whole new gender world for me. I can't explain it to you because you grew up with it.  Enough said?

Rightly or wrongly too-as far as I know, the therapist I am assigned to at the VA, may have never seen another transgender person before. But, I do know at my clinic at least, they became very concerned about my mental well being after I expressed concern last December.  Either way, it's all good. I wish I could forward any relevant info from today's session, but you all read enough of my jabbering here in Cyrsti's Condo, so I won't bore you more.  At least the therapist is getting paid!!!

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl of the Day"

Transgender woman Candis Cayne is our feature today and aging well!!!!