Monday, January 25, 2021

Is Passing Mainly Confidence?

 When I write many posts, I usually come up with ideas I could have added. Normally I didn't add them because the post was already written or would have made the post too long. The same thing happened to me yesterday when I wrote a post concerning passing privilege. 

Then I began to remember a few of my previous posts as well as various comments from Cyrsti's Condo readers such as Connie and Paula. One theme seemed to come through, having confidence in yourself was the main way to "pass" successfully. 

Speaking of "Paula" I enjoyed one of her comments referring to a few of her ill advised fashion choices in her early cross dressing days as being a "howler." I know I was too and no amount of confidence could help me. As a matter of fact, I was doing my best to destroy any confidence I was building by making poor choices. My main example was being way too fond of wigs which were better suited to drag queens. Unfortunately also, the drag queen wigs weren't my only "howler" mistakes. Mentioning them all would make this post way too long! It's easier to write, if there was a bad cross dressing mistake to make...I made it.

The good news is I survived and once I learned to blend in and to dress for other women, I developed confidence and you could say I gained "passing privilege". 

Ironically, nearly all of passing to me became a reality when I arrived at the point when I didn't care what the public thought of me. I just followed my basic rules of blending and confidence and/or passing followed.

I was able to live my life as a transgender woman and put my howler days behind me.

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