Recently I read a post from a fairly populated blog when the transsexual author wrote something to the point that cross dressers have the best of both worlds. I thought immediately the comment was simply the work of yet another elitist transsexual and then began to wonder if someone would blitz me with the same. As of yet no one has. My simple answer is "I don't have the best of both worlds, I earned the right to exist in them."
Here in the "Condo" we received several responses to the post Now You See Me, Now You Don't including this one from Pat:
You are spot on in noting that the male presentation is more convenient. Just the simple act of going to the end of the driveway to get the mail demonstrates the ease of male presentation as opposed to the needs for a proper female presentation. It does seem like you have a wonderful relationship with your girlfriend. Does she read this blog?
Pat, YES! Liz, my gf or partner does read the blog so I really have to be careful about what I write! (Just kidding!) Our relationship is much more than I could ever imagine finding at this juncture of my life. As I have written here in Cyrsti's Condo, she only sees the female side of me, no matter what my exterior says. At times she is a mentor of sorts when I need in depth feminine instruction but more importantly she has helped me to believe in myself. I never really lacked for male confidence but had very little self esteem as a trans woman-until Liz. It's important to point out Liz met me very early into my serious transition years, so she had a chance to run like hell.
Why me, why now and why her is a big question. I never have been a believer in luck per se. Success in anything to me ends up falling in the lap of those who are persistent enough to be in the right place at the right time. Plus, I'm a firm believer in positive karma and I was attracted to Liz's interest in organic spirituality. My term, hers is, she is a Wiccan.
Why now? It's her fault! We were both on a dating site, lived close together and she contacted me. It wasn't easy, at one point in time I was on about four different social dating/networking sites and after many months and mega idiots, I found Liz and another very close friend. It's hard to believe it was three years ago.
Why her? I touched on her spirituality a bit earlier. Her religion I think gives her a basis for an understanding of a transgender person-not unlike the certain ancient Native American cultures who accepted "Dual Spirited" gender people. To mention her faith only, is a real insult to her because she is a very multi faceted person. She is so much more and so am I. Similar to a huge puzzle, we have so many pieces to put together. I just hope I live long enough to see it happen.
Also, Liz shares a vision of me which is the same as mine. She is an artist of sorts and now she has a very human subject to work with- in transition. I just read today HRT takes three years to really sink in and I have a way to go.
Finally, to give you all an idea of how tough it is to me around me for any length of time, I'm a bi polar, dyslexic, hyper active person who happens to be transgender.
So at about now, Liz has read this and has opened a bottle of wine and is trying to figure out just what the hell she got herself into!
Thanks for the question, Pat!