Dating the girl in the mirror?

I started this post literally a year or so ago and discovered it when I was searching the blog for "Trannsnation.com" pieces to transfer. Here is how it started:
Who is your "girl in the mirror"?
Do you want to date her, bring her home to mom or be her?
Good question! I do believe I have written about our Mom's influences on who we have become or are trying to become.
I have said a number of times, my Mom was a good provider and had definite ideas on raising me and shaping my life-but was emotionally distant.
In addition, she was very skilled at trying to intimidate and run off the very few girlfriends I would bring home.
Probably the one I identify with the most now was the one college woman I was friends with for a period of time. (As with most of you, you have to understand my relationships were less than the male norm.)
She was a very outgoing curvy young woman with all this wonderful auburn curly hair. Needless to say, not my Mom's ideal!
So I guess I would have never truly been able to bring my girl self home to my Mom.
I have written a number of times about the blunt rejection I received when I tried one time only. The subject simply disappeared, never to resurface again.
A current meeting would be interesting in that I resemble her and may even inherit some of her body attributes such as breast size.
Would she ever embrace me at all? No, I doubt it. We are similar. Both are not going to change directions. For what ever reasons she couldn't change as much as I couldn't. In reality, did it make her any less of a person?
I often wonder how my life would have changed if she would have at all? If just a portion of the information was available to both of us in the 50's and early 60's, where were we have ended up?
Of course I "googled" the answer and got "no results".
Does it really matter? No. Do I think about it? Sure. In fact, I think about it every time I read about a young transgendered person who is attempting to follow their true gender preference.
The courage to go public with the process and not go "stealth" and help no one is astounding to me!
Deep down, I believe my Mom would have reacted different today.
On the other hand, I can't believe she would have ever accepted my version of my latest girlfriend anymore than the others!

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