Why Are Men Scared of Women?

 It's easier to say why are men so scared of transgender women but it goes so far past all of that. 

To begin with, many men have a frail grasp on their sexuality. Trans women represent the idea to men they may be gay. Plus, since we have spent time on their side of the gender spectrum, we may know more of the so called "tricks" they pull. The farther I transitioned, the more I wondered if I was as transparent in my dealings with women as men were being with me. I found out quite early in my transition how to "dumb" myself down if I was talking about a sports topic with a man. 

Men have a much narrower social structure than women. While women are building their lives around children they have and a man they love, men are building their lives around power structures such as money, sports etc.  All too often, a woman is looked upon as an acquisition of sorts. She must look nice in a car or on the back of a motorcycle. Then in mid life, women can be cast aside for a "new model."

Rather if it evident or not, men know women ultimately hold all the cards. Women have the children and potentially have the ability to live longer. Recently, more and more "glass" ceilings have been shattered. Including in previously male dominated areas such as sports. 

In baseball, the Marlins announced Kim Ng would be the first woman to lead a professional baseball team and more and more in football you are seeing female officials on the field. Then several years ago there was Patti Dawn Swansson, below the Canadian sports writer who transitioned on the job in Winnipeg (Thanks Bobbi). 

Unfortunately, many men are violent humans as cis women learn early in life which effects transgender women as we transition. Shielding ourselves from violent men is a priority when it comes to losing a big part of your male privilege. It's tragic when you consider all the trans lives which are lost each year due to senseless murders. Deep down, the men are threatened by the sexual control women, cis or transgender, have on them.

Finally, men at all levels of society have had to adjust to the push of women to succeed. Sowing the seeds of insecurity. With insecurity comes fear.  

A Transgender First for New Zealand

 A transgender Filipino woman has made history after being the first to achieve the highly coveted title of Miss Intercontinental New Zealand 2020.

Arielle Keil, 26, who was born in Davao City, Philippines as a boy named Andrew, but grew up in Auckland, New Zealand, underwent gender reassignment surgery earlier this year. 

The glamorous trailblazer, who is the first post-operative transgender contestant to compete in the Miss New Zealand beauty pageant.

The Interview

 Friday I was interviewed by a "30 something" college student concerning my lifetime of transgender experiences. I was selected because I matched the age requirement which was presented to the transgender - cross dresser group I am part of. The college student wanted someone over the age of 65. Naturally, at 71, I made the age cut. 

Most of the questions were predictable. Examples were how did I get to where I am now and what advice would I have for younger transgender women and men. I explained the steps I took to finally make my way out of a very dark closet into a very terrifying yet exciting feminine world. I went into the visits I made years ago to transvestite mixers close to my home in Ohio. How I learned very early how there were many different layers to the community which was portrayed as a strictly hetero sexual male experience. In reality, the opposite was the truth. Ironically, I found once again I didn't fit in. I wasn't part of the "A" listers who I described as the impossibly feminine beautiful looking "women" or the cigar smoking, cowboy hat wearing crowd who were desperately trying to hold on to their masculinity even though they were wearing dresses and makeup. It was quite the experience.

Even though I didn't fit in with the "A" girls, I still went along with them as they went out of mostly gay venues after the regular mixers. Slowly I learned how much I wanted to continue living as a woman and more importantly, I found I could actually do it. I was breaking loose from the chains of being confined to a Halloween only experience into a life with others around me who had similar gender interests.

Other questions revolved around the differences between the years involving the advent of the internet and various social media platforms. It's not too much of a stretch to think both events have had the most effect on people being able to come out of the closet and live a transgender life. 

We basically ended the interview with the most predictable question of all, "What advice would I give to younger transgender people?" My answer was probably over simplistic. I said be aware if you can live long enough to experience it, life is but a circle. Right now with the hope of a new president on the horizon, the circle can get rolling again. 

Remember though, even if the going gets tough, sticking together always has the potential to move us forward. In other words, do not participate in ideas such as I am more transgender than you are. 

When you look back to the days when you could be arrested for even going out in public cross dressed as a woman, we have come a long way. But we still have such a long way to go.