Monday, April 23, 2018

"C" is for What?

The Cyrsti's Condo post about being called "sir" at the clothing store, garnered quite a bit of reaction in the comment department:


  1. "Well, you could have said C, as in cross dresser. Or, after being called "sir", you might have thought of another "C" word in reply to her. :-)

    After living so much of our lives as men, it's not surprising that we refer to our past knowledge and experiences almost automatically. I catch myself making a football analogy or something else more "manly" than I might have wanted to say quite often. However, I try to consider the other person when making references, and I say things that will (hopefully) be understood and add to the conversation. So, I think that my conversations and interactions don't necessarily need to be much different than they've always been.

    The hardest thing is not what we say, but how we say it. Having a more-female voice is of great help, or course, but changing our speech patterns from male to female can make more of a difference. The proper accompanying mannerisms may be just as important.
    As a child (and still, as an adult), I would watch a Mickey Mouse cartoon that included Minnie, and observe the differences between them. Mostly, Minnie was created as a feminized version of Mickey. Beyond putting Mickey in a dress, though, the cartoonists made a few subtle changes that made a big difference. While it is easy to conclude that Mickey and Minnie are male and female, recognizing and implementing the subtleties in ourselves can be quite challenging. The last thing we want to do, though, is to end up appearing cartoonish in our presentations."
    I think this would have been one of the times to have a more feminine sounding voice to "tip" the gender balance. Also, she wasn't being negative, as much as boring.
Ithinfg
  1. "Looking forward to the pix!

    On occasion I get the dreaded "S" word...and kind of ignore it. Enough folks do things right, that a few "misgenderings" aren't a big deal for me. But you're right...try to eliminate the characteristics that might cause people to say "Sir."

    It would be nice to do voice therapy. I'm a bit envious. But at this point, without being full time, I don't have a burning desire to proceed with it. And then there's always the wife to consider. That would not go well with her...she tolerates, even as I push the envelope. But I fear going down that road would be a step too far...

    Cheers,

    Mandy"
  2. "My suggestion would be: C as in Crown
    After all every woman IS a Queen.
    :)"
  3.              I must be doing something wrong. I have been called a "Princess", but never a "Queen"...which would be  worse than being called Sir! So maybe I am doing something right after all. Thanks to all of you for your  comments :)
  4.             

Sunday, April 22, 2018

A Good Question

I love it when I read another idea about the transgender identity which I have never considered. Probably because in my egotistical mind, I have considered any and all possibilities. As I think about it, seeing other ideas is one of the reasons I am still addicted to Facebook.

An example is one of the peeps I follow is a transgender woman who refuses to acknowledge the trans label, except to say she is transsexual. Plus, in her latest rant, she says the entire transgender community is just in it for the sex. Which is far from the truth in my recent history. Maybe I am just being naive.

An even better example was sent in by Connie:

"A theoretical question I've considered over the years is: Would I pursue my transition if I should lose my eyesight? My answer has changed as I've navigated through the different phases, but that original vanity never really goes away. I know that I do a credible job of presenting, on the outside, my womanly self. It takes a mirror, and the ability to see myself in it, to be able to accomplish this (although, I've made myself up so many times now that I could probably do a half-decent job without a mirror). Yes, my vanity would take a hit if I couldn't see my outward appearance, but I've become comfortable enough with how I see myself as a woman in heart and spirit that even blindness could not change who I am now. I'd still miss seeing myself in a mirror occasionally, however."

A great question!  Somehow I think I would have to continue my transition and hope the effects of HRT would help me to continue to present well enough in public.

I am so vane now, in most situations I try not to wear my glasses...even though they are women's. So, I don't know how I would approach it!

"C" is for Charles?

Yesterday, I finally grabbed my partner Liz for a girls out shopping trip. We did really well at a store called "Gabes" which features overstocks of name brand fashion clothes. I ended up buying four different tops and one long summer dress. I am sure I will wear one or two of the tops next week at the Trans Ohio Symposium so I should have a couple pictures to pass along.

All went very well, including the changing room attendant directing Liz and I to the women's changing rooms. After we made our decisions, she said you Ladies have a good day. From there, we proceeded to the front registers to check out. As I was paying for my treasures, the clerk asked if I had a rewards card and I said no.  After deciding I needed one, she asked for my email address. It's still under my old name "Cyrsti" so I had to spell it for her. She said did it start with a "C" or a "K" so I said "C" as in Charles.  I wonder if I set off some sort of gender reaction in her, because, out of the clear blue sky, she called me "sir".

After getting upset, I decided not to say anything because I don't hear so well and she sort of said it in passing (or not passing). I just took my purchases and took off.

Then I started to think, the next time someone asks me to spell my email address, to say "C" as in cat. To make sure I'm not sending anyone any subliminal signals.

As I thought about it further, I decided to include things like "Charles" in my next "wall."

In addition, my next "wall" goal will be to try to make the smallest detail of my feminine presentation a priority. As I have written about before here in Cyrsti's Condo, I plan on trying to get involved in feminine voice therapy of some sort and getting some new makeup techniques.

The whole idea has rejuvenated me!

Engineering the Envioronment

  Image  JJ Hart. As I transitioned into an increasingly feminine world, I faced many difficult issues. I was keeping very busy with all the...