Spring?

Old picture with short hair.

Well, March is up to her old tricks. A couple days of positively beautiful Spring weather, followed by a couple of days of rain and/or snow. What it does do though, is get me moving in checking out my seasonal wardrobe. I do have some serviceable pieces left over from last year and they provide a great starting point for this year.

I have also saved back my birthday gift certificate to use. I plan on abusing it for a couple items to wear to my workshop at  the Trans Ohio Symposium and at the Transgender Day of Visibility event Liz and I are helping at. It's coming up in a couple of weeks, so I can't keep putting off doing my shopping.

Getting my nails done is also a priority for me this year and I have to S&S for them. Save and Schedule.

Tomorrow I have another support group meeting at the Dayton, Ohio Veterans Administration  which I might have to miss due to a forecast of everything from rain, to ice, to snow.

Such is life around here (Ohio) in the Spring! 

Cyrsti's Condo Quote of the Day

"To become the woman I am,

I had to murder the men in me."

Jessica Semaan 

When You Fall Off the Wall

We have been writing about climbing transgender walls here in Cyrsti's Condo recently. Of course when and if you climb walls, you can expect set backs and even falling on occasion. Falling though, often is how you learn and discover how badly you want to transition. After all, it's quite OK to enjoy being a cross dresser and not transition any farther.

Long ago, a close friend said I "passed" out of sheer determination. While I never figured out if it was a compliment, I felt it did describe me to a "T." No pun intended.

Two of our regulars were kind enough to send in more comments on their personal "walls."

FABULOUSCONNIEDEEMarch 16, 2018 at 1:59 PM

Climbing a wall is one thing; repelling the other side, another. That point where your little voice was telling you something was wrong probably first started as you had reached close enough to the top of the wall to peep over to the other side. Eventually, it spurred you on to reach the top, and spoke to you as you sat, straddling the wall. Dare I say that this is the place that separates the cross dresser from the transitioning transgender woman (or man)?

For me, balancing my life atop that wall was terrifying and exhausting. I know, and know of, many trans women who find it to be terrific and exhilarating there, though. To them, acquiring a lifestyle of playing both sides, the masculine and the feminine, is part of the game they desire. I had grown so weary of playing the game, because my desire was to have a life - not a lifestyle. Rather than living out my femininity by individual experiences and events, I had to commit myself to taking the ultimate leap to the feminine side, and experiencing fully the good and the bad of it.

Life on this side of the big wall does require facing even more of them, but I've found many of these walls to be lower and easier to climb. In fact, some of my walls, now, can be merely stepped over. "

Paula GoodwinMarch 17, 2018 at 4:54 PM

I think that stage of trying to work out whether you are a cross dresser or need to go "full time" is often a question not so much of do I need to change, as can I bear not to. Certainly for me there can a stage when the wall was behind me and it was going back to trying to be "Him" that felt like climbing the wall. Eventually it just became easier to stay on the female side of that particular wall, of course that then meant another wall was in front of me."

Thanks! All you fellow climbers.