She Didn't Go There!

Yes she did!
I was sitting in a very crowded pub, quite satisfied to watch sports and drink some beer.
I had arrived quite some time earlier and even made a couple restroom trips without so much as a side glance.
Midway through the evening a group of five moved into the bar area where I was sitting. At least a half hour later the woman sitting next to me turned and said "Are you male?"
My mind clicked off many answers and finally decided on the truth. "Partially" I told her. She went on to ask did I have short hair when I was a guy or were the red curls all mine? She said she really wished she could get her her to look like mine. I told her that actually if I let my hair grow out, it is very thick and wavy. It would not be a stretch to think my hair could be colored and styled to look like this.
It was her birthday night and she quickly grew tired of my novelty and my evening was coming to an end.
The only problem I really had was getting read for male.  I'm not naive enough to know that it won't happen.
If "girls" on hormones and surgery get busted, certainly it will happen to me.
Then I considered , is this whole problem just a throw back to my male ego? Is it similar to making the last out in a big baseball game or getting pushed back into a hole in the line in football? OMG I hope not!
As luck would have it, about the time I was having all these deep thoughts I took a look at "Janie's" Blog.
I think she is a gorgeous woman and in her last post she talks about all the curiosity she encountered on one of her shopping trips.  I knew how she was going to approach the same situation I was in because she has written about it before. Essentially she likes being the "special person" she is and if people aren't hurtful or mean-go ahead and ask or look. It's OK!
So once again she got me back on track accepting the exotic critter I am.
The guy side of me will always remember the agony of sports defeats but my girl side will always cherish moments too.
How much fun will it be when I get to the point of answering questions about my gender with well thought of and concise answers?
Somehow I always get taken by surprise.Perhaps the best answer is "male by convenience, female by desire?"

Just Couldn't help it!

I signed up for a vanity sight and felt guilty about it.
Somehow it did not feel right but I wanted to see what others thought of my look...as a woman. There was no transgender tag attached to it at all.
I ever so slowly opened the email saying I received votes. I was very afraid of the results.  Why?
I suppose the score validates me as a girl somehow?  A rating attached to all the trial and error work over the years?
Then I thought, what the heck real women do it why shouldn't I? I'm sure it doesn't validate them as biological women but it does validate their looks. When a girl gets rated the magical "10", sure she feels good!
Well the site I went on was "Hot or Not". I've seen other trans girls explore it and I was certain I saw a couple on the site.
Well so far, my rating is an 8.5! Initially I was flattered and humored equally.
Now my reaction is "Wow"!  How  great is it to be rated close to the really beautiful girls on the site!
But you know, it's just a picture. The inner Cyrsti is flattered but it doesn't make her a better girl!

Damn, I'm Old!

As I was doing my usual "channel surf" a day or so before Thanksgiving, I saw one of my million channels was showing "Ally McBeal" reruns all Thanksgiving Day. If you have never seen the show, it centers around a yuppie law firm. A very quirky 90's show with Calista Flockhart as the star.
I remembered being excited when I saw the shows preview's originally.  Finally a realistic portrayal of one of us! "Ally" was going to change the life of a "transvestite prostitute."
Of course I wondered exactly how long ago was it? 1997!
I also recalled that two things stood out in the show. The first was how Stephanie the "transvestite prostitute" looked. Very attractive with dynamite legs was how I remembered her.
I was not disappointed! I returned home from my family's Thanksgiving feast and turned on the DVD disk. the episode is called "Boy to the World" and it stars "Wilson Cruz" as Stephanie.
In those days, the "outfits of choice" in the law office were business suits with short skirts and Cruz more than held his own with the rest of the women. The best shot was when he was walking down a short flight of steps with "Jane Krakowski". The camera started at their high heels and followed them down the steps in their short skirts. The fact that Cruz had better legs was even more amazing because "Krakowski" was a dancer too.
Unfortunately, Cruz's looks are where the positives end.
The "transvestite prostitute" title didn't thrill me but again the show aired well over a decade ago. Ally and "Stephanie" (Cruz) did see a shrink who briefly mentioned gender dysphoria but that was it.
Stephanie was also treated badly by Krakowski's character in the show. I would have thought an upscale group of yups would have done better.
I would be remiss if I didn't mention "Dyan Cannon" in this show! She had the most amazing hair! The best part was she supposedly was way too old to have all that curly wonderful blond hair!
Awright girls, I'm not smart enough to tell you how to track this episode down. I saw it on the "Reelz" Network on my satellite feed. The rest is up to you!