Jewish Changes

Over the recent years, I have had the opportunity to be accepted into one branch of the Jewish religion. I have not converted but my daughter has. I believe the temple she and her family belongs too is part of the Reform Jewish movement. I have always appreciated the complete acceptance I received. From Southern Florida comes another example of transgender acceptance from one branch of the Jewish religion:

Samantha Zerin (above) headed home from a Yiddish class she had taught as part of her synagogue’s adult education program on the evening of Dec. 19 and knew her life was about to change. That evening, the 775 families at Temple Emanu-El would be getting a message that she knew would surprise some of the people she had gotten to know since joining the community 3 1/2 years earlier.

“Over the past several years, Sam has been exploring Sam’s gender identity,” read a message sent to the congregation from Samantha and her wife, Rachel. “This has been a journey for both of us, full of introspection, learning, and growth. Through this journey, we have come to realize that, although Sam was raised as a boy, she is in fact a woman, and she is ready to begin living her life publicly as such.”

There is much more to Samantha's story you can read here.  The article is called "Coming out as transgender when you are married to a rabbi. Becoming a Rebbetzin.

While we are on the subject of being Jewish, my grandson's Bar Mitzvah turned out to be a virtual affair for Liz and I. She (Liz) wasn't feeling well and since we are living in a virus hot spot in Ohio,  we decided not to go. Fortunately, Liz later felt better. 

So we are home being safe and always wear masks when we go out.

Stay Safe

This "Independence Day" may not be the time to be independent and throw caution to the wind. After all, the virus is taking the toll on us all. Especially if you live in the United States where some people think it is against their personal rights to even consider wearing a mask. I feel sorry for the health care workers who have to take care of all those selfish people. However, I am not going to take up blog space with a rant today. 

So I will leave you with this. Without protest, change never comes.

A Decade Ago

I am not one to remember dates well. For some reason, I remembered this one. 

In 2010, on the Fourth of July weekend, I officially closed what was left of my restaurant and prepared for an uncertain future. Bush's recession had gutted and ravaged the small to medium sized Rust Belt town I lived in. 

Through the haze and uncertainty of losing my wife and three close friends to death a couple years before, I was lost. Ironically (or not so ironically) the only part of my life which was not a mess was the feminine portion. It wasn't so far before all of this I had made a decision to pursue hormone replacement therapy through the Veterans Administration. I was already under their healthcare and for the VA to provide me HRT would be a relatively simple process. 

The only part of my future I knew for sure was I wanted to be a transgender woman. I knew too, I only had a fairly short couple of years to work before I could take my early Social Security and retire without coming out on a job. 

So, the 4th of July ten years ago was truly the beginning of a new Independence Day for me! 

Pride Month is Over

It has been a very quiet month this year concerning Pride activities. In an usual year there are at least six "celebrations" in the Cincinnati-Dayton Ohio metro area. Due to the virus concerns this year, all were cancelled. Then of course, there are the continuing Black Lives Matter marches to consider.

Regardless of the lack of parades and parties, it should be time to stop and consider what Pride stands for anyhow. Many forget the original "Stonewall" riots a half century ago which started the whole LGBTQ movement and typically many of the gay and lesbian members of the community forget it was transgender women of color who were out front spearheading the movement. Once again, the transgender members were moved to the back of the line. 

Ironically, many trans people don't seem to care. My theory is it is because many gay men and garish drag queens have essentially "hi-jacked" the experience. I felt if I saw one more drag queen leading a Pride parade, I was going to run and hide. After all, what did it mean to me.

Then things began to change (around here at least). Slowly but surely, I began to see more and more transgender people at Pride and even a trans woman as a parade leader a couple years ago. All of a sudden the whole process meant more to me. I even think my new board membership on a primarily gay and lesbian board was because they were seeking more transgender input.

The recent supreme court decision backing trans health care is yet another reason to be proud of who we are and proud of the legal organizations who support us.

Even if you are still in the closet, it is time for you to join the rest of us and feel good about who we are. 

Pride month is over but the feelings don't have to be. 

  

Cyrsti's Condo "Thought of the Day"

Shakina Nayfack

Shakina Nayfact is an American actress and transgender activist. She is most known for her series regular role as Lola, a "trans-truther" on Hulu's television program "Difficult People." She was on the second and third seasons and also worked as a writing consultant. 

Jari Jones

Jari Jones is a Black Trans Actress, Model, Creative & Activist.and the front person  Calvin Klein;s Pride campaign. She also identifies as a plus size, lesbian model.

More Mr. Hart

I received a couple great comments on the "Mr. Hart" post. I you remember, the post basically was about the auto repair man who called me Mr. Hart on the phone and "sir" in person. The first came from Tiffawmy:  " Hello Cyrsti
I'm sorry you had such a bad experience.
Do you think the guy was being vindictive or maybe he just didn't know what to do.
Regardless, you persevered.
Next time give me a call. I still carry a set of jumper cables."

Looking back, I don't think he was being as vindictive as much as he was being tunnel visioned if that makes any sense. What I mean is, he had male in his mind from the beginning and nothing I could do changed it. Then again too, maybe he just didn't want to deal with a woman anyhow. Thanks for the offer for the jumper cables. I too have a set around here, I my age you never know when you are going to need a jump! :)

And then, we heard from Connie: "Being called "sir" to your face definitely stings, and it's difficult to not react in a negative fashion. Usually, though, the hurt makes one too upset to be able to react at all. The clever comeback may come to mind, but it's most likely too late when it does. I'm fortunate in that it has happened to me so rarely, but the last time it did I think I came up with the right response. I said, "Why stand on formality? Call me Connie." It got the point across, and it made me feel less of the sting because I had gained control of the situation. In your case, I'm pretty sure that would have worked better than calling him "Grease Monkey" in return (even if doing so might have brought some temporary satisfaction)."

I like the "name" reply and will have to try to remember it if something similar to this happens again. The truth is, it happens so very rarely, i am not prepared. As far as the car goes, in the future I will have to call the auto club again tn the future. In all fairness to them, I have never had a problem in the past. I have always been treated with respect. 

I have thought this through in depth of course and have come up with an idea my whole reaction to the whole situation may be part of my transgender PTSD which i will go into in a future post. 

Kiley May from Canada

From IMDb:

Kiley May (above) is a Hotinonhsion:ni Mohawk multidisciplinary artist from the Six Nations reserve. She is now living in Toronto. Kiley is an actor, screen writer, educator, public speaker and author of the upcoming book "How to Love a Trans Girl."