Breaking Bread with the Brats?

Finally!!!! The much awaited "coming out" meeting with my grand kids is coming up Friday. To refresh your memory, we tried to do it last winter a couple times but were shut out by bad weather. The kids are a 13 year old girl, and two boys-10 and 8. My daughter has predetermined the youngest wouldn't care unless I was transitioning into a cat. The daughter-we may never know.  The ten year old is incredibly diverse and is the one who had the out gay fourth grade teacher. 

By now, any potential intimidation I used to feel about talking to them have pretty much gone away. It's been replaced by what the ten year old is making for lunch! He is still on "house arrest" for getting kicked out of school for fighting.

Seriously, the main issue to the lunch will be what to call me and I have the answer (pre approved by daughter) my so called "final" gender marker name change will be Jessie Jeanne (Jean). Jessie was my paternal grandfather and Jeanne was my Mother. The kids can call me J.J. My only problem is I have been able over the years to build a life as Cyrsti. None of that will matter on Friday.

We have discussed this before on Cyrsti's Condo. Sure I'm biased about these three but they are sharp so it's important to me to not talk over their heads and just as important not to talk under them. Plus, all of the sudden it's trendy? to have a transgender relative.

All in all, it should be an interesting day and we will see how the kid does with lunch! 

Taking the Transition Out of Transgender?

Shelle Iles

To

Ms. Cyrsti Hart

Today at 4:16 PM

I thought I would pass this along to you in hopes you could give it your thoughts in your blog.

Lately, I have stopped using the t-word with respect to people who are transgender. The t-word I have stopped using is not the pejorative that might come to mind. It is the word transition. For much of my eight years of teaching about what it means to be transgender, I was inadvertently teaching something I have come to understand creates a different understanding than the one I was trying to create. I talked about my transition. It made sense to me at the time. Today, I have come to know that I did not transition. I certainly did not go from being male to being female. I simply began to uncover the female who had been there all the time.

First-Shelle lles, (above)  thanks for your thoughts and I am going to break down certain excerpts to comment on and show to everyone here in Cyrsti's Condo. 

Dropping the "transition" term does make all the sense in the world and actually easier to explain once you get someone's attention. Gender is simply what the world sees and the world never saw the true me-until now. No transition to it and possibly another great subject to bring up in June to Simmons College.  Back to Shelle lles:

"Transition involves going from one thing, to something different. Psychologically, in spite of the intended meaning, this is processed as going from male to female. The word says one thing, but the mind hears something totally different. The idea that I have gone from male to female is psychologically reinforced, and no one actually realizes what just happened.

My "transition" was a transition of presentation. It was not a transition of identity. Yes, I did have medical intervention, but that is not necessarily part of the transgender experience. Taking hormones and having surgery did not make me more of a woman. They did not transition me."

I TOTALLY agree with Shelle lles last paragraph (and have for a long time!)

Last but not least:

"Transition? No, I didn't do that. I simply stepped off a stage, leaving behind a costume that never fit, and revealed my authentic self to the world. I revealed my previously hidden truth. That's a better word. Truth. Now, there's a t-word I can get behind."

Shelle

As I wrote earlier, there is more substance to the comment she sent me which we will get to later!!!! Also, to visit her blog-go here!

Cyrsti's Condo "White Satin"

All right Jim! You look great but what is your sister going to say about you wearing her wig and dress and your Dad missing his liquor? And-Oh by the way-I just heard the garage door open!