Halloween Treats

Recently I was out running a few errands and decided to stop at one of my favorite thrift stores to check on warm fuzzy sweaters to go with my boots and leggings.  All of the sudden I noticed a man and a woman in the shoe section, then the dress section, then the purse section and I thought duh! I know who they are shopping for. The bewitching or bebitching Halloween weekend is coming quickly and the couple was shopping for him. How cool! I always have a romantic spot for couples having quality time together, especially when he is carrying a black sparkly dress.

Of course I have my own fond, fun stories of Halloween. Many I have shared here in Cyrsti's Condo and many I have meant too but simply ran out of time or memory.

If worked correctly Halloween can be the time when we directly come out to the world, or tentatively test the waters.  My first "coming out" experience was a complete result of a Halloween party.

Over the years I have put together my own set of Halloween parameters:

1.- The first time you "knock em dead" as a Halloween beauty can be passed off as a fun game. The second or third time? Folks are wondering.

2.-The biggest costume "give away" is when you shave your legs. Everyone in the room knows you may have gone a "little too far",

3.-If you do it, own it. The experience is a wonderful beginning look at how men and women will treat you. Unfortunately, I've seen those who hide in the corner and not have fun.

4.-Forget about "passing"!  Unless you are one of the rare minority of cross dressers who is a natural feminine type, everyone is looking for a costume and you are in one!

5.-Halloween is a great time to "sort of/kind of" come out of the closet. At the least many of us are hoping against hope someone we care about will ask the right questions and we can have the right answers. You are dying to tell the world all of this preparation to look feminine does go deeper than what they may think.

In my case, Halloween adventures were too much fun and ended way too early but set me back years in my thinking. At most of the parties I went to there were many people who knew me well as my male self. The biggest "good news/bad news comment was: "you make a good looking woman".  Good news? Of course my ego loved onto the comment! Bad news?   In reality I know now I wasn't making anything.  I was simply taking my first transgender public steps expressing who I am.

The actual  good news was I didn't try to over think any of the Halloween parties.  I somehow managed to create a good time! (Of course I did!)

I promise I will somehow try to remember more of the parties and pass the memories along!

Example. One of the best costumes I have seen was years ago. A guy was doing "Elvira" and he did her really well in the wrong venue.  He was in a gay venue, had he gone to a straight venue I'm sure he would have gotten a great amount of admiration from the men! The shame was he seemed to not be with any friends and not having the best of times. Who knows, maybe "he" wasn't a guy at all?

Cyrsti's Condo Musical Interlude

We Got Mail

Actually this goes back a bit and I have no excuse except I have been chasing my tail and never catching it!

Our "Transition by Definition" post brought in several thoughtful comments including this one from Shelle who included a "Coming Out Day" response:


"I consider that I am in transition and likely always will be to the end of my. I guess making great fanfare of it just isn't a part of me so I mostly let coming out day go by with not much interest really. But yesterday I saw this posted on facebook by the person who runs the transgender program at my local pride office,and it made me wonder if this really helps or hurts our cause in general,as for me I want no part of it.

Skye Ashton Brown For NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY:
I'm a loud and proud queer – of the transmasculine genderfluid variety. I'm pan and I'm butch, a survivor and a fighter. I'm an activist for respect and a public disturbance. I'm in love with humanity and determined to end all oppression. I'm white and I'm purple plaid, I'm a fabulous glitter-spraying unicorn coming to public demonstration near you. I'm a partner and a sibling, a dog parent and a hopeful romantic. I believe in supporting bodies and bending minds and I don't believe in social binaries.

I’m a Marxist and the only thing in this world I hate Is capitalism because capitalism hates people. I don't learn books, I learn life and my life is your life since your life is my life’s advocacy. I’m a second generation American And a first generation revolutionary. I’m bilingual and bad at both languages and I genderfuck our fucked up gender binaries. I’m a radical feminist and demand radical change. I believe in body positivity and positively love consensual sex. I’m privileged to be able to come out! I hope you can, too. Either way, know that I love you."

Drag Queens at a Pride March

I agree with you Shelle but for slightly different reasons.  I don't understand this person's need to mix all of this into a great big blender and come out with political declarations from all ends of the spectrum's including ignoring the fact that radical feminism has led to mega hate and discrimination against the transgender movement. I also wonder in a Marxist state if you can be a "fabulous glitter spraying unicorn"?" Also, personally I spend a lot of time at Pride events explaining to people I'm not a drag queen like the unicorns on the right.

Plus Innis Annity commented on our "Beyond Transition" post:


"These examples you use never made it across the gender divide. They got stuck in "trans-land". This is why they are so committed to the "fluidity" of gender. They are neither male nor female, neither goose nor gander. They are 'forever trans*' on"

Thanks Innis! If we go back to the post and take a look, most of the terms came from the original author however I do feel you made a very good point and the term which comes to mind which became stuck was "transvestite"!

As always, thanks to all of you for reading and commenting! You are the best!!!