Saturday, October 20, 2012

Girl Stuff

Jillian Page writes a blog for the Montreal Gazette
and she presents great perspective on the transgender experience.
This is a great post concerning the female socialization process we go through:

"I was chatting with two women last night — one born-female, the other a transitioned woman — about my concerns with the way some women give me the evil eye when I wear certain clothes. I got two very different sets of responses from them. The born-female woman, who is my partner in life now and someone I love very much, says some women are just naturally jealous of each other, and that I just need to learn to live with it. I shouldn’t be so sensitive, and should just shrug it off. In other words, c’est la vie. I should add that my partner would be the first one to let me know if something I am wearing is not appropriate (she hates my long wigs, for example). The transitioned friend first asked me what sort of clothes are drawing the evil eye, then suggested I need to dress in clothing that would “better match my age.” Grrrr . . . them’s fighting words to me . . . First, I don’t wear mini-skirts to work. Occasionally, I wear a dress that falls, say, 2 or 3 inches above the knees. But mostly, I wear dresses or skirts that fall to the midway point of my calves. I don’t show any copious amounts of cleavage because, sadly, I don’t have a heck of a lot of cleavage to be showing. Other women in my office reveal more than I can ever hope to have. So, objectively speaking, at the very most, I might show a bit more leg that others do . . . but then again, I’ve seen other female colleagues show the same amount if not more. As for my choice of clothing, some of it is a little more youthful, but most of what I wear in public is fine for a woman of any age."

Follow her link above for more.

Will the Circle be Unbroken?

Recently, I re encountered one of my protagonists in a place I go to quite a bit for a drink.
He is middle aged and is one of those guys who comes off as just too smooth. Worse yet, when you see beneath the veneer there is structural damage.
Over the year or so that he has been coming there when I have, he has always made the point of seeking me out and always manages to come up with some sort of snide comment concerning my gender presentation. About the time I get mad enough to really rock his world, he seems to sense it and scurries away.
The visit was quite the eye opener for me anyhow because no one seemed to know who I was with my new hair. The significance of the experience was not lost on me since once again I had gone full circle. I actually have been going there for approximately 6 years. My wife and I actually went several times before she passed away and I continued to go back as a girl until the present. For most of the crew and all of the regulars not to know me was huge.
Back to my buddy.  He circled me a couple times on his way to the bar's lottery machine. Finally he slithered up and said "I finally recognized you over here-looking all normal and that." Well, I guess that's a compliment?
Often I have thought about saying "pull up a seat, let's talk." If I thought it would do any good I would try to explain I never was just a guy getting dressed up as a girl to come out and socialize. Did he understand what female hormones are and that I have been on them for most of the year now and OH Gee- I neglected to mention I have been growing my hair for a year and that is what he is seeing. The bottom line is I don't like or respect him enough to waste my time.
Finally, I know the normal he saw is finally the real me and it's only the beginning.

Transgender Cinema

I can only describe this cinema trailer for the Carl(a) movie is a view into transgender, transsexual reality:

What Would Mom Say

Image from Jenna Norman on UnSplash This week my question to answer on the year long bio I am writing for my daughter and family as well as ...