Monday, October 19, 2020

Gender in a Cage

Among the rest of the critters around here (three cats and a dog) we have a ferret. Ours used to have a companion in her cage but he passed away some time ago. Since she really doesn't have a choice, the ferret is very territorial of what is in her cage.

This morning, as Liz was feeding her, she left the cage door open for a couple minutes. As I observed the ferret checking out her potential freedom, I was surprised she didn't attempt it. She simply leaned out of the opening and never made a break for it. 

The whole episode made me think of my life as a transgender woman. I reflected back on all the years I had to stare longingly at any opening I had to cross dress and leave the closet. But, similar to our ferret, it took me years to make the leap to gender freedom and live my life in a feminine world. 

Who knows? Would I still be lingering behind if it had not be for a series of friends who helped push me out of my closet and into the world. Another way to look at it was, I viewed changing how I lived crossing the gender frontier as sliding down a slippery slope towards a very steep cliff. 

About that time, when I was frequenting sports bars cross dressed, I encountered, friends such as Kim, Racquel and Nikki who always saw my feminine side. As I was able to slide down the slope and see the opening which was preventing me from gender transitioning totally and escaping my cage or closet.

Then there was people like Liz and Andrea who made sure my landing was soft and more exciting than I ever could have imagined. I also would be remiss if I didn't mention another group of people such as Trish, Ed, Jen., Steve and Debra (and others) whose acceptance was so critical to me building a new life. 

Of course, I can't tell what the ferret thinks but I am so happy I made it out of my cage!


No comments:

Creative Gender Tensions?

  Image from Levi Stute on UnSplash As I moved along my long and bumpy gender path, seemingly I created many gender tensions which were over...