Recently I posted about the rare couple of days I saw two other transgender women (or so I thought) and received this comment from Connie which ironically described both:
"The trans-scowl, or even aloofness, shows a lack of self-confidence. Of course, the overconfident trans people who overdo it in their manifestation of (perceived) femininity - or masculinity - can be just as difficult to understand. As my job affords me the opportunity to observe many trans people every day, I see both extremes, yet I see far fewer trans people who might be perceived as fitting into the "just a regular woman(or man)" category. I believe that I do fit into the category, but I wouldn't mind hearing it from one of those other trans women I see (and who see me) everyday. The trouble is that they can't get past their scowl, aloofness, or narcissism to even look at me, let alone speak to me. Then again, they might have to hear what I have to say to them in the process. :-)"
As I wrote, the first trans woman I saw shot me one side glance which would have melted Clint Eastwood. We shop at the same grocery store and I have seen her before. The first time she was totally overdressed in heels and hose and this time looked much better in a skirt with flats and a long sleeved top. Of course I don't think she was looking for my approval-or vice versa. I also think she desperately wants to fall into to the "just a regular woman" category as Connie spoke of.
I just wonder how she does with some of the store's crew who go out of their way to be nice-to me. Which is always an instant reminder of how deep a trans scowl I may be forgetting I wore on the day in question. Maybe someday I will be able to see if she wants to sit down and have a cup of coffee in the store's shop?
The other person I saw walking down a hall in a hospital, and the only reason I thought she was trans was her size, the way she was put together and she was trying too hard. So maybe a little narcissism (Connie). We only had a glance at each other and she stuck her nose in the air and was gone, so I doubt we will meet again,
Having said all of that, I know for sure of a couple transgender women working at the Dayton Veterans Hospital. As I was leaving the other day, one came teetering down the sidewalk at me in her hose and heels, but we spoke!
Success!!!! I just want to be a regular me-it's a full time job.