Busy Week on Tap

For some reason, this always seems to happen to me, almost everything backs up into one week. Next week is shaping up to be one of those.

For example, Monday is the transgender - cross dressers support group meeting I go to fairly regularly. I go, because normally something happens which is quite interesting from one person, or another. After all, where else could I have met a transgender woman who is registering legally pregnant from her blood tests?

And, speaking of blood, Tuesday is my three month regular appointment with the vampires at my hematologist. They check for excess iron in my blood and take a pint out if it is too high. I have a certain trepidation due to the fact the person doing the work last time was not very good. The two before her were excellent.  One way or another though, I will get through it.

Wednesday, is my monthly meeting with my therapist. At which time, I will bitch about being mis-gendered from the incompetent clinician from the day before. Being the comprehensive therapist she is, she will commiserate and tell me to call her out...regardless of the needle in my arm.

Friday, is another scheduled  karaoke night get together with the trans-cross dresser support group. I have to give a couple of them credit for getting up there and trying to belt out very difficult songs. I understand the whys, but not so much the hows. For example, I don't think I will ever be able to listen to The Rose by Bette Midler the same again.

Finally Saturday, is our usual day to run errands and go to Liz's karate class.

Years ago, if anyone had tried to tell me my life as a transgender woman would be this active, I wouldn't have understood how it could.

Straight Leg Jeans

If for one reason or another, you have never been able to wear skinny jeans, good news is coming for the Spring. New, straight leg jeans are in, according to Debra Borland and the Fabulous After 40 fashion blog.

If you are like me, you may have asked what's the difference?  According to the blog:

"The main difference is basically the width of the leg opening. Skinny leg jeans have a closely tapered fit that hugs the thighs and calves and continues all the way to the ankle.  Straight leg jeans fall straight down from the hip to  ankle. Although snug through the thighs, there’s more breathing room through the knees, calves, and ankles."

And, more importantly:

"Straight leg jeans are considered a classic and look good on everyone because they’re more forgiving than skinny jeans. They’re particularly flattering on pear-shaped gals and inverted triangle bodies because the wider leg opening helps balance out these body types. Hourglass figures can also rock a pair of ladies straight leg jeans and gals with wide calves appreciate the extra width through the lower leg area."

Follow the link above for more information on making your transgender or cross dresser presentation even better!

Heads Up? Or Down?

I recently revisited experiences I have had being mis-gendered, mostly in medical situations.  Very simply, I have basically have given myself only a couple alternatives when I respond.

My one hard and fast rule is to be very kind to anyone who is about to stick a needle into me. My second rule is to call anyone else out on their blunder. I feel it is up to me to educate people on what to do when they encounter a transgender woman or trans man.

Connie wrote in and took her rules to a different level:

"When I've been mis-gendered or had my dead name used in the past (it hasn't happened since changing my name and gender markers), while in a waiting room, I would always stay seated for a few seconds and not respond to the call. People in waiting rooms tend to look up upon hearing anyone's name, but they go back to their magazine within a few seconds. I always figured that I would be contributing to the outing of myself had I responded immediately, and waiting just those few seconds allowed me to discreetly answer the call. Of course, timing is everything, as I needed to also make eye contact with the caller before she or he repeated. After we were in a private place, I would correct them politely. 

My spouse works in a dentists office. They are careful to be respectful of trans patients, and they clearly mark charts pertaining to preferred name and pronouns. Just a couple weeks ago, though, there was a new assistant in the office for a one-day "working interview." While calling the trans woman patient to the back, she did use the proper name, but she blew the encounter - and her interview - by proclaiming: "You don't look like a man at all!" I think she meant it as a compliment, but it just goes to show that even the well-intentioned can be ignorant, misinformed or uninformed. Of course, there are plenty of people who are just plain stupid, as well."

Good point! Thanks Connie.