Shock and Awe

A week ago, I began to transition my massive finances from one bank to another.

All went well, I thought with the very young "personal banker" who set my new account up.

The problems started though, when he asked if I had ever done business with the bank before. I said yes and the system took over.

As he worked out all the forms, they all had my correct new name on all the paper work. Naively, I was so proud of myself, until...

A week later my debit cards arrived in the mail. As I opened them, imagine my disappointment  when they came imprinted with my old male name!

I recoiled in shock. I learned the hard way again how much I never wanted to see that name again.

I will be heading back to the bank today!

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

Most transgender persons have felt this way during their life!Nature reserves the right to inflict upon her children the most terrifying jests.

Thorton Wilder

Exceeding Trans Expectations?

For years I worked in a highly competitive industry in which, success was decided on a daily basis. What have you done for me lately was the rule.

As so often happens, by chance yesterday, Liz and I started talking about expectations and how they affect growing up transgender, or as a cross dresser. Being a cis woman, her idol for a long time was Christie Brinkley. Then of course, harsh reality set in and she learned she would never achieve the lofty heights of Brinkley's beauty.

As we compared mental notes, we began to connect the dots between growing up cis, versus transgender.

I said, Raquel Welch was, (and is) the cis woman of my dreams. I often wondered what I could ever give up to look like her for one day.

Like so many dreams, unrealistic expectations come and go, but if you are creative and persistent, realistic expectations can be achieved.

First of all, I had to learn what looking good (for a man in a dress) meant, then begin to discover the hard way what my positives were. Examples were, people told me I had wonderful eyes and I started to play them up. More importantly, I learned to dress for other women and not how my male self would view me. In other words, Raquel had to go away, to be replaced by the desire to blend in with other women around me.

Raquel Welch

As I achieved it, I started to relax my expectations of how I looked and began in earnest to discover my full personality as a transgender woman.

To my surprise, over time, I couldn't believe the expectations I did achieve.

Sorry Raquel, still love you. Just not as much :).