Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Family Ties?

Thanks to all of you who responded to my Cyrsti's Condo post about my only sibling (younger brother by two years) who pulled the plug this year for an invitation to the family Thanksgiving. When I told him I was transgender.

If you are wondering how it became his domain, it's because my deceased wife insisted she cook it and serve it every Thanksgiving for at least a decade. Just bring yourself.

As I wrote, first I was surprised, disappointed and then just hurt. And, most certainly, there was some anger worked in. 

The first comment comes from Shelle lles:

"I'm more than distressed about your brother,you deserve much more in life.
As for the mammogram and Shrink thing that was last week for me have a really funny story to share on my mammogram coming to my new blog soon.
Hugzz my dear friend keep moving forward always"

Thanks Shelle! You know I will and all of this has given me an extra incentive to do so! We will look for your post!

And, Connie wrote"

"I'm sorry about your brother's un-accepting "condition". It's an example of how our own transitions require the transitions of everyone around us. If he could only understand the despair you lived with all of those years, in fear that revealing yourself would lead to rejection. That fear was more disturbing to you than the actual rejection, 

I imagine. I'm so happy that you have such wonderful support from Liz and your daughter, though. We can't choose the families we're born into any more than we could have chosen the gender identities with which we were born - but we can choose who we love. I pray that your brother comes around to that realization some day."

Deep down, I feel like he already has and he didn't have the "balls" to stand up to his in laws and my nephews. His burden-not mine and yes Liz and my kid have already stepped up to fill the void.

In fact at Liz's family Thanksgiving her 90 year old NRA card carrying WWII Vet, took the occasion to tell how much he enjoyed having me there. As one chapter ends, another begins.

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