Thursday, February 1, 2018

Take That!...Bitches!

From Connie, concerning rest room usage and a fun story:

"FABULOUSCONNIEDEEJanuary 30, 2018 at 1:16 PM
The transgender/cross dresser group here in Seattle has bylaws that must be agreed to in order to join. The largest section of those bylaws is dedicated to proper ladies room behavior. I can only imagine this to be so because of specific incidents that had occurred over time. The fact that these rules are so specific in regard to "no brainer" behaviors has always been disturbing to me. I also imagine that alcohol was a factor in many of these incidents, but that certainly does not excuse them. Bylaws often don't mean a thing to one who is pumped up with alcohol, however.

The first time I went out with this group (about ten years ago) was also the first time I'd ever gone into any public establishment. My reluctance to use the ladies room for the first time had me reluctant to use it along with anyone else, as well (including, if not especially, anyone in the group I was with). While I was sitting safely in the stall, one of the members bought off a female server to walk into the ladies room and yell out, "Hey, there's a man in the ladies room!" I recognized it immediately as a prank, and I re-entered the main room with my head held high and walked confidently back to the table. Of course, the group was laughing and applauding, but I did not let it phase me. As I took my seat, I said, "I knew that there were no men in the ladies room because none of you were with me there."

Bullying can come from even the most unexpected people. I wrote this off as a sophomoric initiation prank to a "sorority" that I quickly learned I did not want to belong. Not only did I not want to belong, I simply did not belong at all. If nothing else, that experience confirmed what I had begun to understand about myself - that I was not merely a man in a dress.

I could have qualified that last statement with "not that there is anything wrong with that." Sometimes there is something wrong with that, however. Bad behavior has nothing to do with gender identity in any form."
I too really don't like the "team potty" effort, unless it is with Liz in a situation which I consider to be "iffy"! Otherwise I will "do it" on my own. Thanks for the comment.

2 comments:

  1. All I can say about this jaw-dropping story is that I would DIE if those idiots did that to me. I would never associate with them in ANY way, shape or form after that since I am not a person that could ever get over a "prank" of this caliber. OMG - the thoughtlessness of it! Good on you for taking it like a "man" though, I couldn't... Hugs,

    Tanit

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tanit, I don't think that I took anything at all. I reacted to it as the strong woman I was becoming at the time. Just prior to my meeting with this group, it was necessary for me to use a cash machine outside of a nearby bank. I was tentative about doing it, and I waited in my car until I decided the coast was clear for me to not have to encounter another person. As fate would have it, though, as I stood facing the machine, I heard a man's voice behind me asking, "Excuse me m'am, do you have a light?" When I turned around to face him, he immediately said, "Oh, sir, do you have a light?" That was much more devastating than was the incident with the bullying cross dressers I experienced later. It was the first close-up encounter I had had with anyone, and my biggest fear of being read and outed became a reality almost immediately.

      Please read my comment to Cyrsti's next post for more of my feelings about this subject.

      Delete

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