Monday, November 30, 2020

Where Were You Born?

 On occasion I become humored when I read of someone who says they were "born into the wrong body." 

I figure I didn't have a real choice. I had no choice on my parents, where I was born or the gender I was assigned. No matter what I thought, those three "facts" were non negotiable. Of course, as I grew, I learned while the "Big Three" were non negotiable, they could be questioned and even changed. 

Like them or not, my parents will always be my parents. Sure, they had their faults but who doesn't. As far as coming out to them, I tried to come out to my Mom. I was rejected and never tried again. I never tried to come out to my Dad. After all, I was doing my best to live a robust male life, so who cared?

I cared of course. As my gender dysphoria continued and began to take it's own peculiar shape, I learned to suffer silently. Even though I think I came up with every possible question I could over why my gender issues were so prevalent, at no time did I come up with the idea I was born into the wrong body.

What I did come up with was I had a overwhelming desire to change the body I had. The more I was able to feminize it the better I would feel. I was fortunate in that the body I had was healthy enough to undertake hormone replacement therapy at a later age in my sixties. Thanks to HRT, I was able to learn the body which I was given was fluid enough to provide me a male foundation to play football and survive Army basic training all the way to presenting as a woman in public. 

So, I guess I can say, I wasn't born in the wrong body. I took what I had and adapted. 

1 comment:

  1. If some people believe that they were born with wrong body, does that mean others were born with the right ones? There are very few people who are completely happy with their own bodies - even those who are admired and considered to be "perfect" by the larger population. What we're born with should not be reduced to a value judgement, because there is no right or wrong about it.

    My gender identity and body are not congruent. I realized this at a very young age. If anything, I spent most of my life thinking that my gender identity was wrong, and that I could only wish that my body matched it. Of course, I was made to feel even more wrong for having the wish than for the feminine identity, itself. After all, a good person is able to buck up and use their mind over matter - or so I was taught. It wasn't until my 50's that I came to realize that it didn't matter if I didn't mind; not if anyone minded, really.

    This is not meant to be an analogy, but the subject reminds me of one of my favorite Abraham Lincoln quotes. When he was once accused of being two-faced, he responded with: "If I were two-faced, do you think I would have chosen THIS one?"