Friday, June 15, 2018

Why Me?

During my walk this morning, I happened to encounter one of the neighbor's older daughters as she was leaving the house.

Per norm, she barely looks at me,which is fine too. She fits the norm child in the neighborhood. Blond, slim and pretty.

For a second I flashed back to my teen aged days (a large flash :) and wondered what my life would have been like if I had been able to live the way I wanted. I graduated high school in 1967, in the middle of the Vietnam War and I have written many times here in Cyrsti's Condo concerning the amount of angst I lived through about being drafted. I didn't have wealthy parents or bone spurs to keep me out of the draft but I did have the where with all to go to college and earn a four year deferment. None of which really helped me with my gender dysphoria.

Four years later, my deferment ended and I was drafted.  I figured my little stash of female clothes wouldn't be accepted during basic training at Ft. Knox, so I purged before I went. Again I was getting farther and farther removed from my dreams of ever living like a girl. I persisted though and the world began to slowly catch up to me.

I learned there were others who yearned to live like me and even stumbled upon a new term...transgender. Slowly and all too surely, I finally came to the conclusion I was indeed transgender.

Now at least, I could achieve my goal of living my life out as a woman. I learned the hard way again what it truly meant to cross the gender frontier.

It's still tough to do but when I see another woman, I can think I finally made it.

2 comments:

  1. Oh, did this post click with me!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So happy to hear it! Makes the whole blog worth while! Thanks :)

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