Cyrsti's Condo "Archive Post"

This post was written back in 2012 and considers the idea of a cross dressing = transgender addiction:

"I was working on my book last night and going over chapter ideas.  One of the old ideas I always felt  ridiculous was cross dressing being an entry gateway to transsexualism. Not unlike the marijuana/ heroine connection. If you put on your Mom or sister's clothes, sooner or later you would be going under the SRS knife. If you took a hit on a bong, heroine and ruin was in your future.

Years later as I think about it, I can see how the connection can be made. As I explored my life as a closeted cross dresser, for the most part I was just confused. Nothing was enough. Dressing more, a new outfit or wig and even passing well at the mall were only temporary fixes. Something was missing.

I have smoked the "heathen weed" but thank goodness never went any farther in the drug culture but have heard the impact cocaine or heroin has on a mind. I can compare my fix in a similar sense I guess.  Of course without the terrible health problems drug use causes.

The end result was I finally ended the short term fixes and faced up to my true self. I found my own transgender religion. I vividly remember the night not so long ago it happened. I was me and I embraced myself totally for the first time in my life.

can see however the feeling that night could have been compared to the great feeling of wellness heroine supposedly gives you. The difference is I don't need a hit every day to maintain the high.

That's the reason I can say cross dressing was not a gateway drug for me, I found I used it to mask who I really was. The whole time I was transgender...DUH! But certainly others may be different in that cross dressing may be the only gender fix they ever need for whatever reason. No different than drinking a beer when you come home from work and not a fifth of bourbon.

Life is kind of like that...right?"


Comments

joanna Santos said…
I went through exactly the same type of thinking Cyrsti and finally realized it wasn't a drug but the denial of your true nature emulating a withdrawal cycle we had created by denying it. Takes a while to figure this out however and when you do its a great relief. Nice post
Paula said…
I'm reminded of the old joke, What's the difference between a cross dresser and a transsexual? ~ Three Years!